Anyway...so back on topic here.

One of the last conversations her and I had was when she had decided not to have a lung transplant.

I remember her telling me that the doctors were very rude to her.
...."well you'd only live for five more years anyway"...they would say.
...."don't you think the lungs should go to a healthy person"?

She specifically mentioned their tone but also that they had told her that she would continue to be in pain far beyond what she was going through then.

In order to even be considered for a lung transplant she had to stop the pain patch treatment and would have to continue without it after.

While we were living at the ranch in the above video she had displaced a rib while lifting a saddle.
She didn't find out about it for years.
...years after back pain "treatment" and not treatment for what was causing the pain.

Not sure if any of you know this but CF is one of the most painful ways to die; not just in the last years leading up to it but the death itself.
She was always so brave and strong.
It seemed easy for her to decide.
I'll never forget that phone call. We both cried and that was when she forgave me. I think she knew how much of a normal life I wanted to give her but just lost myself somewhere along the way.

Now no matter what the punchline is to this atrocity that's at least one thing I can remember. Not just all the good memories. ..how brave and strong she was but that she's not in pain anymore.

Reading all of the things you guys post though. ....it is hilarious to me.

You sound like sad little bitches.