Fun Time Breastfeeding Pic on Time Magazine Stirs Debate

[animosity]

I just thought I'd put my 2 cents in as a mother breastfeeding her 6 month old (first baby)

Yes we care. Most mums are super nervous about breastfeeding in public. But you have a screaming baby who is hungry (and when they decide they are hungry, well dammit, they want it NOW) and you are worried about the crying upsetting people, you are worried about breastfeeding them for your own diginity, you are worried about others making nasty comments - so you have a lot going on. It is tough as a mum listening to your baby upset. I was so paranoid that I would take a bottle of expressed milk everywhere with me in case I couldn't find a feeding room because I didn't want the looks and judgement.

If friends or family are around I feed in front of them. My MIL always asks if I want them to leave the room. When I am out, I plan where the local breastfeeding rooms are in our shopping centres etc. Only once have I done it in full view of the public, and that was down the beach and I was mostly covered.

I do find it quite disturbing reading reactions to the magazine cover (both here and in other forums), that women were angry that there were being judged for not breastfeeding, but those same women are judging women who choose to breastfeed. Women spend too much time judging each other (especially when it comes to parenting).

I return to work next week but will continue to pump and breastfeed. Plan to wean when my lil monkey is 1 but that is my personal choice. World Health Organisation recommendation is 2.

As a first time mum, my main aim is to keep her alive and healthy - anything else is a bonus :-)

thanks for coming out of hiding to add your input!

that's really all people are asking for... someone who makes an effort to find the available resources upon arrival, or before the crisis moment hits (t-5 seconds to hysterics and counting). i'm sure there are a whole lot of moms like you, otherwise, us non-baby folk would be seeing teh breasteses every time we turn our head! a few rotten apples...

i've seen the look of horror on women's faces when they just can't get the kid to calm down. i know it's hard. you're doing a great job! although - from what everyone says about changing with experience, perhaps you'll also change your tune with your second. i hope not!

[okac]

the problem is that mothers shouldnt have to feel that way about feeding their kids

and the people who are uncomfortable with it should never have had that feeling...

I'm not saying get rid of the feeling, i'm saying there is something seriously wrong with society when people are raised to learn or however it happens that boobs make them uncomfortable when being used for their #1 purpose.

[Ron_NYC]

the problem is that mothers shouldnt have to feel that way about feeding their kids

and the people who are uncomfortable with it should never have had that feeling...

I'm not saying get rid of the feeling, i'm saying there is something seriously wrong with society when people are raised to learn or however it happens that boobs make them uncomfortable when being used for their #1 purpose.

http://i.imgur.com/NTFs7.gif

[TheFavoriteDaughter]

the problem is that mothers shouldnt have to feel that way about feeding their kids

and the people who are uncomfortable with it should never have had that feeling...

I'm not saying get rid of the feeling, i'm saying there is something seriously wrong with society when people are raised to learn or however it happens that boobs make them uncomfortable when being used for their #1 purpose.

But to people who have never breastfeed or produced milk, it's not the number one purpose. My breasts are used for sexual pleasure in my bedroom. So of course it's a little uncomfortable when I see them outside of that environment. The mind doesn't automatically compute, "Feeding child."

[okac]

I'm not saying its YOUR purpose, its THEIR purpose. The reason women have breasts are to feed children.

I'm also not saying you shouldnt be uncomfortable, I'm saying it sucks that people are uncomfortable.


Also, I dont have children... But I understand why boobs are there...

[White trash bitchy blonde]

Just because you are a mother doesnt mean you have to right to do whatever you want in public and not expect someone to feel slighted or whatever. Non nursing mothers have just as much rights as a nursing mother.

IMO, if you say that breasts are being used for their number 1 purpose to a mother who cant nurse, you are crossing a line and it borders on insulting. Just because someone isnt comfortable with an exposed breast in public, doesnt mean their is anything wrong with them, they are just uncomfortable.

[White trash bitchy blonde]

But to people who have never breastfeed or produced milk, it's not the number one purpose. My breasts are used for sexual pleasure in my bedroom. So of course it's a little uncomfortable when I see them outside of that environment. The mind doesn't automatically compute, "Feeding child."

I was trying to say this but my head wasnt computing.

[animosity]

and the tides have turned...

the reason breasts have developed may be to feed children, but throughout the lifespan of a woman, they are used for that purpose less than 5% of the time.

[k_bass]

Just because you are a mother doesnt mean you have to right to do whatever you want in public and not expect someone to feel slighted or whatever. Non nursing mothers have just as much rights as a nursing mother.

IMO, if you say that breasts are being used for their number 1 purpose to a mother who cant nurse, you are crossing a line and it borders on insulting. Just because someone isnt comfortable with an exposed breast in public, doesnt mean their is anything wrong with them, they are just uncomfortable.

Who said anything about non nursing mothers having less rights than a nursing mother? All Okac said was that it sucks that breastfeeding in public can make someone so uncomfortable. Breastfeeding IS what breasts are for, whether you can breastfeed or not, that's why women have them.

I think it's really weird how many women are/would be uncomfortable seeing a woman breastfeed her child. I've seen one person breastfeeding in public, she wasn't covered and I still didn't see anything. And I was having a conversation with her the whole time. It's just not that big of a deal.

[okac]

listen, vernice, you should know i would never think poorly or want to make someone who CANT breast feed feel bad.
people who cant breastfeed still know why boobs happen. jesus christ

[White trash bitchy blonde]

Im not going to argue. I even sat there and quoted TFD because I knew I was having ahard time wording what I thought but I agreed with what she was saying.

[okac]

I'm not arguing you guys being uncomfortable, I'm simply stating that it sucks that anyone (females mostly I guess) would feel that way.

I dont expect anything I say to change the way someone feels, I was just stating something.

[angelaiscaustic]

I'm with you okac. I think it's sad that a nursing mother has to plot out where she can go to avoid people giving her nasty looks while she feeds her baby, and no one seems to have a problem with the fact that people are giving her looks in the first place (besides you).

Also, the reason human women have breasts all the time, and not just while nursing, is that the round shape of them makes it easier for a baby to eat and breathe at the same time, and it's easier to keep them like that all the time, biologically speaking (animal teats aren't round). Whether you nurse or not, that's what titties are primarily for. I can't believe there's even debate about this.

[angelaiscaustic]

Two things:
I am phone posting in bed while eating Swedish fish, so I'll post up the link I read the "why titties are round" answer on tomorrow from the comp.

Before anyone accuses me of being down on non nursing mothers, I don't really care if you nurse, bottle feed, or give them coca cola. I would care about the last one but if you do that you're probably from a state I'll never ever go to sooo

[White trash bitchy blonde]

I don't know, maybe it's me but I have honestly never thought of breasts as only a food source. I mean, I know they are used for that but when I see breasts, I think of them in the sexual meaning.

I think the only time I really associate breasts with nutrition is when I see a baby attached to them.

[debk589]

I would NEVER judge/react to a woman tastefully breastfeeding her baby publicly - I mean, they make so many cute little booby cover ups these days, 1/2 the general population would never even know what was taking place under that adorable little paisley sheath. :) But if a woman whipped out her boob, uncovered, and stuck it in her toddlers mouth (the Time cover), yes, that would certainly be a cause for concern and most definitely get some reactions. Anyone who says they wouldn't think twice about that is full of poo. Big stinky baby cloth diaper poo. Until I had a baby boobies were strictly a bedroom toy for the hubbs, but now it's totally different, I so wouldn't judge a woman for breastfeeding her BABY as I wouldn't like for a woman to judge me for not breast feeding my BABY. But toddlers are a whole different story.

Sidebar: I actually had a woman tell a friend of mine that since she couldn't breastfeed; going by Darwin's theory of natural selection, her baby just wasn't meant to survive. So help me God if someone ever said that to me I would fucking slap them so hard directly in the face.

[sarabei]

I would too Deb..OMG....and I don't have a problem with women breastfeeding. For me, it isn't something I would want to do, but those who do...I am happy for them, but I think anything over a year is pushing it. That cover was way to provocative imo. And nursing until six? ***gag*** That is just nasty.

[nerysinci]

I don't judge mothers for how they choose to feed their children - I'm not a Mom. BUT....you can't argue that breasts are for feeding the young, even if it IS only 5% of the time. I'm not a mother, but I don't look at breasts as being strictly sexual, and I like women! lol so if I see some lady feeding her kid, I'm not like, "MMM SEXY TITTIES, but isn't that indecent exposure?," I'm more like, "Meh, lady feeding baby," and my eyes continue to scan my surroundings. It barely even registers. It bothers me that society has bred us into beings that are uncomfortable seeing nakedness. Everyone should just be naked, unless the weather doesn't permit it lol

Do I want to stare at some dudes grundle for three hours - no, but it bugs me that people wear clothes. It's led to many a disappointed evening :/

[beli]

but it bugs me that people wear clothes. It's led to many a disappointed evening :/

[okac]

I don't know, maybe it's me but I have honestly never thought of breasts as only a food source. I mean, I know they are used for that but when I see breasts, I think of them in the sexual meaning.

I think the only time I really associate breasts with nutrition is when I see a baby attached to them.

NO ONE SAID THIS

No one is doubting breasts are used for sexual pleasure. All that has been said is that the REASON THEY EXIST is to feed babies. Because that is the reason they even exist, that is why it is sad that people are uncomfortable about them. And to say again since it has been misread, I'm not saying STOP being uncomfortable, I am just stating that it sucks. (for both sides)

I have absolutely no problem seeing boobies and going YAY, and also seeing them as a nutrition source for a baby

As for a toddler, I think the women who breast feed at older ages are usually doing it at home because the child is also eating solids and I *think* the breast feeding at that point isnt so much a food source as it is some kind of connection or calming thing... (I think??)

[animosity]

I don't judge mothers for how they choose to feed their children - I'm not a Mom. BUT....you can't argue that breasts are for feeding the young, even if it IS only 5% of the time. I'm not a mother, but I don't look at breasts as being strictly sexual, and I like women! lol so if I see some lady feeding her kid, I'm not like, "MMM SEXY TITTIES, but isn't that indecent exposure?," I'm more like, "Meh, lady feeding baby," and my eyes continue to scan my surroundings. It barely even registers. It bothers me that society has bred us into beings that are uncomfortable seeing nakedness. Everyone should just be naked, unless the weather doesn't permit it lol :/

buuuu-uuuut... how many 12 year old boys are there hiding behind target shrubbery thinking just that? all people everywhere are in different stages of learning and understanding. it's not just about adults here.

THINK ABOUT THE CHILDREN!!! OH, THE POOR CHILDREN!

i think i'd feel majorly uncomfortable if i was a mom who realized i just contributed to a young boys sexual awakening by popping it out to feed in a public place. it's not that i'm saying that it's cool for anyone to feel uncomfortable, mother or public, but personally, when the chance of ANYONE being uncomfortable with my actions (myself included) i look for ways to mitigate it beforehand.

Do I want to stare at some dudes grundle for three hours - no, but it bugs me that people wear clothes. It's led to many a disappointed evening

[Dr. Strangelove]

I don't judge mothers for how they choose to feed their children - I'm not a Mom. BUT....you can't argue that breasts are for feeding the young, even if it IS only 5% of the time. I'm not a mother, but I don't look at breasts as being strictly sexual, and I like women! lol so if I see some lady feeding her kid, I'm not like, "MMM SEXY TITTIES, but isn't that indecent exposure?," I'm more like, "Meh, lady feeding baby," and my eyes continue to scan my surroundings. It barely even registers. It bothers me that society has bred us into beings that are uncomfortable seeing nakedness. Everyone should just be naked, unless the weather doesn't permit it lol

Do I want to stare at some dudes grundle for three hours - no, but it bugs me that people wear clothes. It's led to many a disappointed evening :/

I agree with you.

I don't get why people have issues with women publicly breastfeeding. It seems like a strange mix of perversity and prudishness.

[Dr. Strangelove]

double

[Dr. Strangelove]

i think i'd feel majorly uncomfortable if i was a mom who realized i just contributed to a young boys sexual awakening by popping it out to feed in a public place. it's not that i'm saying that it's cool for anyone to feel uncomfortable, mother or public, but personally, when the chance of ANYONE being uncomfortable with my actions (myself included) i look for ways to mitigate it beforehand.

See, I just don't think that's reasonable.

How many people could there possibly be who honestly experienced their sexual awakening by watching a breastfeeding mother? Is that really an issue that ought to have any impact in the debate? Also, it's not her problem. Breastfeeding a baby isn't a sexual act. In fact, it's a particularly non-sexy act.

I don't think anyone should have to struggle to complete a basic, necessary and normal task like feeding a hungry baby for the sake of saving strangers from mild and temporary discomfort. And it would be a struggle to find somewhere private to breastfeed in public with a hungry, crying baby.

[nerysinci]

buuuu-uuuut... how many 12 year old boys are there hiding behind target shrubbery thinking just that? all people everywhere are in different stages of learning and understanding. it's not just about adults here.

THINK ABOUT THE CHILDREN!!! OH, THE POOR CHILDREN!

i think i'd feel majorly uncomfortable if i was a mom who realized i just contributed to a young boys sexual awakening by popping it out to feed in a public place. it's not that i'm saying that it's cool for anyone to feel uncomfortable, mother or public, but personally, when the chance of ANYONE being uncomfortable with my actions (myself included) i look for ways to mitigate it beforehand.

I honestly would not give two fucks if I ushered in some kid's sexual awakening. It's gonna happen sometime, and I probably won't even know about it. Meh