Fun Time Breastfeeding Pic on Time Magazine Stirs Debate

[Gimik]

i just wonder if the mothers care at all about how their decision affects others living outside of the 3-foot bubble.

ok, i'm done for.

I just thought I'd put my 2 cents in as a mother breastfeeding her 6 month old (first baby)

Yes we care. Most mums are super nervous about breastfeeding in public. But you have a screaming baby who is hungry (and when they decide they are hungry, well dammit, they want it NOW) and you are worried about the crying upsetting people, you are worried about breastfeeding them for your own diginity, you are worried about others making nasty comments - so you have a lot going on. It is tough as a mum listening to your baby upset. I was so paranoid that I would take a bottle of expressed milk everywhere with me in case I couldn't find a feeding room because I didn't want the looks and judgement.

If friends or family are around I feed in front of them. My MIL always asks if I want them to leave the room. When I am out, I plan where the local breastfeeding rooms are in our shopping centres etc. Only once have I done it in full view of the public, and that was down the beach and I was mostly covered.

I do find it quite disturbing reading reactions to the magazine cover (both here and in other forums), that women were angry that there were being judged for not breastfeeding, but those same women are judging women who choose to breastfeed. Women spend too much time judging each other (especially when it comes to parenting).

I return to work next week but will continue to pump and breastfeed. Plan to wean when my lil monkey is 1 but that is my personal choice. World Health Organisation recommendation is 2.

As a first time mum, my main aim is to keep her alive and healthy - anything else is a bonus :-)

[animosity]

I just thought I'd put my 2 cents in as a mother breastfeeding her 6 month old (first baby)

Yes we care. Most mums are super nervous about breastfeeding in public. But you have a screaming baby who is hungry (and when they decide they are hungry, well dammit, they want it NOW) and you are worried about the crying upsetting people, you are worried about breastfeeding them for your own diginity, you are worried about others making nasty comments - so you have a lot going on. It is tough as a mum listening to your baby upset. I was so paranoid that I would take a bottle of expressed milk everywhere with me in case I couldn't find a feeding room because I didn't want the looks and judgement.

If friends or family are around I feed in front of them. My MIL always asks if I want them to leave the room. When I am out, I plan where the local breastfeeding rooms are in our shopping centres etc. Only once have I done it in full view of the public, and that was down the beach and I was mostly covered.

I do find it quite disturbing reading reactions to the magazine cover (both here and in other forums), that women were angry that there were being judged for not breastfeeding, but those same women are judging women who choose to breastfeed. Women spend too much time judging each other (especially when it comes to parenting).

I return to work next week but will continue to pump and breastfeed. Plan to wean when my lil monkey is 1 but that is my personal choice. World Health Organisation recommendation is 2.

As a first time mum, my main aim is to keep her alive and healthy - anything else is a bonus :-)

thanks for coming out of hiding to add your input!

that's really all people are asking for... someone who makes an effort to find the available resources upon arrival, or before the crisis moment hits (t-5 seconds to hysterics and counting). i'm sure there are a whole lot of moms like you, otherwise, us non-baby folk would be seeing teh breasteses every time we turn our head! a few rotten apples...

i've seen the look of horror on women's faces when they just can't get the kid to calm down. i know it's hard. you're doing a great job! although - from what everyone says about changing with experience, perhaps you'll also change your tune with your second. i hope not!

[White trash bitchy blonde]

Im glad someone else mentioned the whole scraping of the poo out of the cloth diapers. That's what I was referring to as the not so nice part of it all but I wasnt sure how to say it.
I remember my mom babysitting a little boy, I dont remember who he was, I was young also but I remember her changing the cloth diaper and using the safety pins and stuff but then I also remember her cleaning the icky onein the toilet.

I am beginning to just say 'to each their own' on the whole BF thing. Im not weirded out when I see it, the act itself does not bother me in any way but Im not used to seeing a 2, 3 or 4 yr old nursing. It's not somehting I have seen in person so would I stare? Probably, If I didnt stare, i would be caught off guard.

Far be it for anyone, even myself to reallyt judge someone on how they take care of their children. I guess from reading more about it and listening to the woman who was covered on Time, it made it less of an enormous deal. Different to me still, but I really really liked how she wasnt all gung ho and telling people to fuck off for not doing what she does.

[animosity]

But why do that when you can say "fuck everyone and their comfort" and do whatever you want?

call me a sucker, but i'm always trying to make sure all parties are 'in a safe place'.

The part of your brain that regulates shame and decency gets flushed out with the afterbirth, I swear.

doh!

Im glad someone else mentioned the whole scraping of the poo out of the cloth diapers. That's what I was referring to as the not so nice part of it all but I wasnt sure how to say it.
I remember my mom babysitting a little boy, I dont remember who he was, I was young also but I remember her changing the cloth diaper and using the safety pins and stuff but then I also remember her cleaning the icky onein the toilet.

I am beginning to just say 'to each their own' on the whole BF thing. Im not weirded out when I see it, the act itself does not bother me in any way but Im not used to seeing a 2, 3 or 4 yr old nursing. It's not somehting I have seen in person so would I stare? Probably, If I didnt stare, i would be caught off guard.

Far be it for anyone, even myself to reallyt judge someone on how they take care of their children. I guess from reading more about it and listening to the woman who was covered on Time, it made it less of an enormous deal. Different to me still, but I really really liked how she wasnt all gung ho and telling people to fuck off for not doing what she does.

yeah. baby poop is gross. we ended up with quite a few plumbing mishaps but that's what you get when you have a 10 y/o change the baby...

i have less of an issue with the attachment parenting than the public breast-feeding. i agree with you... to each their own. i don't even have an issue with that cover either. it's just an editorial picture and provoking title meant to get the buzz going and ultimately it does it's job well. even if people react negatively to it, a good dialogue is created.

[Ron_NYC]

I think I'd just throw my hands up and shout "Oh, come on!" if I saw it.
As I stormed away obviously.

[animosity]

that seal thing actually happened to me once. true story.

[Ron_NYC]

[morbidT]

Damn! I wanted to beat someone to it but I couldn't find anything. I was looking for the Shreck "come on!"

[beli]

fucking ron

[animosity]

[Ron_NYC]

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/ar...ish-wrong.html

That's just selfish and wrong: How the image of a mother breastfeeding a toddler reignited a health controversy

By Dr ellie cannon

Revolting! Just wrong! Surely that?s child abuse!

These are just a few of the reactions I heard from mothers who had seen the cover of Time magazine last week, featuring an attractive woman breastfeeding a boy who looked almost old enough to attend primary school.

As an image it was certainly attention-grabbing.

The picture of Jamie Lynne Grumet and her three-year-old son illustrated an article about Dr Bill Sears, the American parenting guru who believes that if we all lived on a desert island, this is what women would do.

As a mother of two, I strongly disagree. And judging by the vociferous responses from other women with children, I?m not alone.

Women who breastfeed their older children argue they are doing nothing wrong, and that each mother should be free to do what is right for their child, whether not to breastfeed at all or continue indefinitely.

But as a doctor, I must advise there is little benefit and possibly harm to be done by the latter. Nobody would argue against the physical and emotional benefits of breastfeeding a baby.

The World Health Organisation recommends they are breastfed exclusively until they are six months old, and that breastfeeding continues until the age of two, complemented with other foods.

Breast milk boosts the immune system and breastfed babies are less likely to suffer from chest and ear infections, eczema and obesity in later life.

But there is little evidence of any health benefits beyond the age of one. Breastfeeding babies is natural and normal ? but in my opinion, breastfeeding your child up until three or even later is unnecessary.

Dr Sears is an advocate of something called attachment parenting, which involves parents and children sleeping in the same bed, babies being carried in slings ? even at home ? and mothers breastfeeding until they want to stop, whatever the age of their offspring.

Supposedly, these behaviours are essential to making mother and child bond properly. According to Dr Sears, proper bonding is supposed to nurture better emotional health and make the child more intelligent, calm, secure, confident, empathic and independent.

Every cry from an infant is a cry for help and should never be ignored, he says. Dr Sears even claims that allowing a baby to cry for too long can cause them brain damage.

The attachment parenting crowd argue this is the way parents have been doing things for thousands of years. I?m not an anthropologist, but I do know that we?re living in an era when these things are not the norm.

Much of Dr Sears? philosophy has become mainstream in the two decades since he published his first book ? papoose-style carriers are a common sight, and of course children should be cuddled as much as they need to be.

But no health professional would officially recommend co-sleeping, as there are concerns the baby is at increased risk from Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.

And breastfeeding until a child goes to school is fulfilling a mother?s needs, not a child?s. It is self-indulgent and possibly narcissistic. Children are at the centre of our world but it doesn?t mean we need to be at the centre of theirs.

Toddlers develop independence and evolve from the natural stage of separation anxiety to become explorers of the world around them. Parents need to be close by but they don?t need to be attached.

The worry of many developmental psychologists is that extreme breastfeeding dampens this natural stage of a child?s development and serves only to indulge the mother: it gives her attention and a purpose.

Children go to nursery aged three, so they need to be able to cope without their parents. This is why we toilet-train them, teach them to feed themselves and encourage them to voice their opinions.

If Jamie Lynne Grumet advocated keeping her son in nappies or letting him outside only in a buggy, would she be applauded or would people realise she was harming her son?s natural development?

Children are sexually aware from a young age. They become interested in body parts and what they do. Breastfeeding a child old enough to walk over to his mother and open her shirt creates a confusing message about personal boundaries and our bodies.

These publicity stunts do nothing for the real issue: that today, fewer women than ever are breastfeeding their babies.

The latest Department of Health statistics published last December suggest 74.1 per cent of women initiate breastfeeding but at six to eight weeks only 47.1 per cent of infants are still being fed this way.

Pictures such as this serve only to make the women who breastfeed within the normal boundaries seem as freakish as their ?extreme? sisters.

[g r ee n ey e s]

I obviously tend to agree with that article.

[bowieluva]

Meh. So some women are running it in the faces of others that they can breast feed and other women are bitter bitches who can't so they throw fucking stones at the ones who can. Pretty sure being an asshole is the ultimate two sides of this fight.

[g r ee n ey e s]

I was under the impression everyone was an asshole with an opinion.

[Cat Pajamas]

I was under the impression everyone was an asshole with an opinion.

As I taught my children to say: "Opinions are like butts: everybody has one".
Oh, and I still breastfeed my 8 year old. MOM OF THE YEAR!

[Ron_NYC]

As I taught my children to say: "Opinions are like butts: everybody has one".
Oh, and I still breastfeed my 8 year old. MOM OF THE YEAR!

You're kidding.

[Cat Pajamas]

You're kidding.

Uhh, yeah. I do not breastfeed my nearly grown child, that's just gross.

[Ron_NYC]

Uhh, yeah. I do not breastfeed my nearly grown child, that's just gross.

You have to make sure nowadays.

[okac]

the problem is that mothers shouldnt have to feel that way about feeding their kids

and the people who are uncomfortable with it should never have had that feeling...

I'm not saying get rid of the feeling, i'm saying there is something seriously wrong with society when people are raised to learn or however it happens that boobs make them uncomfortable when being used for their #1 purpose.

[Ron_NYC]

the problem is that mothers shouldnt have to feel that way about feeding their kids

and the people who are uncomfortable with it should never have had that feeling...

I'm not saying get rid of the feeling, i'm saying there is something seriously wrong with society when people are raised to learn or however it happens that boobs make them uncomfortable when being used for their #1 purpose.

http://i.imgur.com/NTFs7.gif

[TheFavoriteDaughter]

the problem is that mothers shouldnt have to feel that way about feeding their kids

and the people who are uncomfortable with it should never have had that feeling...

I'm not saying get rid of the feeling, i'm saying there is something seriously wrong with society when people are raised to learn or however it happens that boobs make them uncomfortable when being used for their #1 purpose.

But to people who have never breastfeed or produced milk, it's not the number one purpose. My breasts are used for sexual pleasure in my bedroom. So of course it's a little uncomfortable when I see them outside of that environment. The mind doesn't automatically compute, "Feeding child."

[White trash bitchy blonde]

But to people who have never breastfeed or produced milk, it's not the number one purpose. My breasts are used for sexual pleasure in my bedroom. So of course it's a little uncomfortable when I see them outside of that environment. The mind doesn't automatically compute, "Feeding child."

I was trying to say this but my head wasnt computing.

[okac]

I'm not saying its YOUR purpose, its THEIR purpose. The reason women have breasts are to feed children.

I'm also not saying you shouldnt be uncomfortable, I'm saying it sucks that people are uncomfortable.


Also, I dont have children... But I understand why boobs are there...

[White trash bitchy blonde]

Just because you are a mother doesnt mean you have to right to do whatever you want in public and not expect someone to feel slighted or whatever. Non nursing mothers have just as much rights as a nursing mother.

IMO, if you say that breasts are being used for their number 1 purpose to a mother who cant nurse, you are crossing a line and it borders on insulting. Just because someone isnt comfortable with an exposed breast in public, doesnt mean their is anything wrong with them, they are just uncomfortable.

[k_bass]

Just because you are a mother doesnt mean you have to right to do whatever you want in public and not expect someone to feel slighted or whatever. Non nursing mothers have just as much rights as a nursing mother.

IMO, if you say that breasts are being used for their number 1 purpose to a mother who cant nurse, you are crossing a line and it borders on insulting. Just because someone isnt comfortable with an exposed breast in public, doesnt mean their is anything wrong with them, they are just uncomfortable.

Who said anything about non nursing mothers having less rights than a nursing mother? All Okac said was that it sucks that breastfeeding in public can make someone so uncomfortable. Breastfeeding IS what breasts are for, whether you can breastfeed or not, that's why women have them.

I think it's really weird how many women are/would be uncomfortable seeing a woman breastfeed her child. I've seen one person breastfeeding in public, she wasn't covered and I still didn't see anything. And I was having a conversation with her the whole time. It's just not that big of a deal.