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Thread: The Good, The Bad, The GoFundMe, YouCaring & other mass funding sites

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    Moderator nestlequikie's Avatar
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    The Good, The Bad, The GoFundMe, YouCaring & other mass funding sites

    What are your thoughts on these types of sites?

    Is it typical to expect to start a mass funding plea for any untimely death or issue?

    It just seems to be like internet kudzu... it is everywhere I look.
    I hope that when the world comes to an end, I can breathe a sigh of relief, because there will be so much to look forward to. - Donnie Darko

  2. #2
    Administrator Olivia's Avatar
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    I don't get it. There is a site for every single 'cause'. What did people do before?

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    Moderator nestlequikie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Olivia View Post
    I don't get it. There is a site for every single 'cause'. What did people do before?
    THAT's what I want to know!! I have known people who died before their time, tragic circumstances, etc. The church or community phone tree usually went to work and got food, meals for the family and someone would infrequently have a raffle or bake sale or silent auction to benefit folks.

    I think I am a considerate and fairly generous person but every day I feel more and more and more like no one is doing for themselves. If I had to bury my child, I would like to think I could get it done without the assistance of a mass funding plea.

    I just think I am FundBlind ™ right now.
    I hope that when the world comes to an end, I can breathe a sigh of relief, because there will be so much to look forward to. - Donnie Darko

  4. #4
    Senior Member animosity's Avatar
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    i'm very wary of all the stories on these sites. also, i can't believe so many people are willing to toss money at anyone with a sad story.
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    Senior Member animosity's Avatar
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    someone mentioned that they saw a dude with a sign asking for donations for someone's funeral the other day and likened it to those sites... he was like - wha??? where's the carwash? i gotta get something for my money
    Quote Originally Posted by songbirdsong View Post
    "Say, you know who could handle this penis? MY MOTHER."

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    Senior Member CanaryDiam's Avatar
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    In essence I don't mind these sites for people who really need the help, whether paying for disease treatment, paying for a burial, etc. It's definitely easier than traditional fundraising. But the problem is you have no way of knowing if these people are who they say they are, have the problem they claim they have, hell they could even be some rich asshole who'd rather spend our dime than his own to bury his brother. What's even more disturbing is when you look through and find people have donated to someone who simply wants a new wardrobe because they lost weight and then see a big ole' $0 for someone trying to fund their chemo.

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    fun hater Shins's Avatar
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    I'm not that hot on these sites. Obviously there's a few one-off situations where I can see it being the best resort (I think a member here had one bc she had cancer and several children and legit needed help...)

    But the way it's branched out into this "Fund me for anything I want or ask for" spiral and all that does is open doors to leeches and frauds. Like, the page for the pizza guy who got stiffed $7, now has a $35k go-fund-me that he actually had to put the breaks on. That's fucking ridiculous. I know this is a free country, but fuck man, there are so many other causes that need that money that people are willing to piss away.

    It is also going down the road of being standard practice for people needing money for funerals.

    I mean, if we're really going to look at these sites... Are these donations tax deductible? Who's to say someone won't donate to their own cause to take a phatty deduction?
    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    Listen, if no one cares when a crazy noodle walks in and executes children with a gun, no one cares about anything.

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    fun hater Shins's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by raisedbywolves View Post
    No, they are not deductible unless these people have previously set themselves up as a charity. Donations to legal charities that have all the right paperwork are legally deductible. If you donate 500 bucks to help your neighbor out because they lost their leg, or donate to a gofund me individual that needs help burying their child it is not legally deductible.
    That mostly makes sense.

    So what happens to the people who receive the money? I'm almost 99% sure they have to claim it on their taxes as income, but do they?

    The IRS does not allow people to just get free money. When my company tries to give me a bonus, and they take like 35% of it.
    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    Listen, if no one cares when a crazy noodle walks in and executes children with a gun, no one cares about anything.

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    fun hater Shins's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by raisedbywolves View Post
    They are totally required to claim it as income. Do most people do it? Probably not. However I am going to bet that the IRS is mining these sites since they are a great compilation of income that people probably exclude from income and it is all easily traceable.

    Yep, bonuses, contest winnings, money from Ebay selling, etc....techinically it's all taxable income in the IRS' eyes.
    Sit back and wait for someone who didn't claim their donations and was targeted by the IRS, to try to sue GoFundMe for not providing some sort of disclaimer or tax statement at the end of the year.

    Bowie - I never suggested my culture was yours. I don't personally like wedding showers and think they're antiquated, but I see an event around wedding-donation as more of a gracious gesture, than "swag". I have family all over, but I don't think there would be so many that wouldn't attend my wedding that I'd need a webpage. Maybe it's just me being a crotchety old woman and not jiving with new trends - because I have next to no trust in making online transactions. I'd send a card. It's just my feelings and opinion about it, and we disagree. NBD. If me saying it was tacky offended you, sorry.
    Last edited by Shins; 01-20-2015 at 10:43 AM.
    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    Listen, if no one cares when a crazy noodle walks in and executes children with a gun, no one cares about anything.

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    Moderator puzzld's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by raisedbywolves View Post
    They are totally required to claim it as income. Do most people do it? Probably not. However I am going to bet that the IRS is mining these sites since they are a great compilation of income that people probably exclude from income and it is all easily traceable.

    Yep, bonuses, contest winnings, money from Ebay selling, etc....techinically it's all taxable income in the IRS' eyes.
    But not gifts. And as I understand it, most gofundme type transactions are considered gifts by the IRS. (I'm sure they'll rethink that if this sort of thing continues.)


    Eight Tips to Determine if Your Gift is Taxable

    IRS Tax Tip 2012-62, March 30, 2012

    If you gave money or property to someone as a gift, you may owe federal gift tax. Many gifts are not subject to the gift tax, but the IRS offers the following eight tips about gifts and the gift tax.

    Most gifts are not subject to the gift tax. For example, there is usually no tax if you make a gift to your spouse or to a charity. If you make a gift to someone else, the gift tax usually does not apply until the value of the gifts you give that person exceeds the annual exclusion for the year. For 2011 and 2012, the annual exclusion is $13,000.
    Gift tax returns do not need to be filed unless you give someone, other than your spouse, money or property worth more than the annual exclusion for that year.
    Generally, the person who receives your gift will not have to pay any federal gift tax because of it. Also, that person will not have to pay income tax on the value of the gift received.
    Making a gift does not ordinarily affect your federal income tax. You cannot deduct the value of gifts you make (other than deductible charitable contributions).
    The general rule is that any gift is a taxable gift. However, there are many exceptions to this rule. The following gifts are not taxable gifts:
    ? Gifts that are do not exceed the annual exclusion for the calendar year,
    ? Tuition or medical expenses you pay directly to a medical or educational institution for someone,
    ? Gifts to your spouse,
    ? Gifts to a political organization for its use, and
    ? Gifts to charities.
    You and your spouse can make a gift up to $26,000 to a third party without making a taxable gift. The gift can be considered as made one-half by you and one-half by your spouse. If you split a gift you made, you must file a gift tax return to show that you and your spouse agree to use gift splitting. You must file a Form 709, United States Gift (and Generation-Skipping Transfer) Tax Return, even if half of the split gift is less than the annual exclusion
    You must file a gift tax return on Form 709, if any of the following apply:
    ? You gave gifts to at least one person (other than your spouse) that are more than the annual exclusion for the year.
    ? You and your spouse are splitting a gift.
    ? You gave someone (other than your spouse) a gift of a future interest that he
    or she cannot actually possess, enjoy, or receive income from until some time in the future.
    ? You gave your spouse an interest in property that will terminate due to a future event.
    You do not have to file a gift tax return to report gifts to political organizations and gifts made by paying someone?s tuition or medical expenses.
    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    lol at Nestle being some vicious smiter, she's the nicest person on this site besides probably puzzld. Or at least the last person to resort to smiting.
    Quote Originally Posted by nestlequikie View Post
    Why on earth would I smite you when I can ban you?

  11. #11
    fun hater Shins's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by raisedbywolves View Post
    I would question whether this kind of stuff would truly be a gift, hence why I think the IRS could tax it. With them soliciting the way they are I was questioning that. Maybe it truly would be a straight out gift. Definitely not deductible on the giver's side as charitable though.

    As for gifting in general, there are a ton of different rules that make up what contributes to the limit (like you can pay your relative's tuition straight to the school and it doesn't count towards the limit, but if you give it to them to pay the tuition it is a gift...same for hospital bills) and some of it is really crazy in my opinion.

    Back to Shin's first comment...I think the whole reason the IRS put that a deductible donation has to go to a registered charitable organization, instead of you just trying to help someone that needs help on your own, is because someone at some time tried to donate to themselves and claim it. You know some bright spark tried it at one time.
    I think people are still doing this, tbh.
    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    Listen, if no one cares when a crazy noodle walks in and executes children with a gun, no one cares about anything.

  12. #12
    What do you care? Boston Babe 73's Avatar
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    It's become the norm. I'm not sure why unless folks have unforeseen medical costs or didn't have life insurance. It used to be that you donated to a charity in the person's name. Not send money to the family.

    I have a friend who's Son has been having medical problems and she started one. Except she had just bought a brand new car, took a trip to Ireland and when bringing him in posted something on FB about how she found out the hospital she wanted a procedure done at wasn't covered by her insurance. "I'll have to figure it out later". By what? Asking everyone else for money when you had the means to avoid the debt?

    I'm very wary of the sites.
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  13. #13
    fun hater Shins's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boston Babe 73 View Post
    It's become the norm. I'm not sure why unless folks have unforeseen medical costs or didn't have life insurance. It used to be that you donated to a charity in the person's name. Not send money to the family.

    I have a friend who's Son has been having medical problems and she started one. Except she had just bought a brand new car, took a trip to Ireland and when bringing him in posted something on FB about how she found out the hospital she wanted a procedure done at wasn't covered by her insurance. "I'll have to figure it out later". By what? Asking everyone else for money when you had the means to avoid the debt?

    I'm very wary of the sites.
    Exactly this. I'm sure plenty of families have the money, they just don't want to spend it on that and use the pity route instead.
    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    Listen, if no one cares when a crazy noodle walks in and executes children with a gun, no one cares about anything.

  14. #14
    The Dude abides. strmmrgrrl's Avatar
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    Can we throw in the fundme's for a new kitchen or trip to Bali et al generally raise more money than the kid with cancer? Where's Bowie?
    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    Getting arrested for coke in Vegas is like being found eating a chocolate bar in the willy wonka factory.

  15. #15
    Cousin Greg Angiebla's Avatar
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    I've never given any money to those sites. Even if I needed money badly I would never ask strangers for it. I have too much pride.
    Those commercials with the starving kids and animals that are suffering really bother me. I don't know about the starving kids, but I don't believe the money is necessarily going to the animals.

    I don't know if you guys know about the animalrescuesite.com can click daily to give to causes. Same with freekibble.com.
    Last edited by Angiebla; 01-20-2015 at 08:57 AM.

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    Moderator bowieluva's Avatar
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    Oh god the gofundme for the new bathroom.

    I will say this: a lot of the gofundme's that seem to be of a more personal nature (help me move, honeymoon) are not intended to be for the public. They're just using the site to give their friends and family a place to donate, but the site doesn't offer privacy options to limit who can see what. Smart people will explain this or add a disclaimer to their gofundme, slightly dumber ones will just word it in a way that it is obvious that they mean that.

    There's also shit like this:
    http://www.gofundme.com/AmericaAgain

  17. #17
    fun hater Shins's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    There's also shit like this:
    http://www.gofundme.com/AmericaAgain
    Victor Davis seems to have a lot of spare cash on hand in this weary America we live in.

    Where does money like this go? Just into the bank account of the person who made it? This page was started like a year ago and someone commented 10months ago asking what the progress was and there was no response.
    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    Listen, if no one cares when a crazy noodle walks in and executes children with a gun, no one cares about anything.

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    The Dude abides. strmmrgrrl's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    Oh god the gofundme for the new bathroom.

    I will say this: a lot of the gofundme's that seem to be of a more personal nature (help me move, honeymoon) are not intended to be for the public. They're just using the site to give their friends and family a place to donate, but the site doesn't offer privacy options to limit who can see what. Smart people will explain this or add a disclaimer to their gofundme, slightly dumber ones will just word it in a way that it is obvious that they mean that.

    There's also shit like this:
    http://www.gofundme.com/AmericaAgain
    Ah! I never realized that. It just always looked to me like they were asking the public at large. However, asking family and friends for handouts for a $45k kitchen remodel et al still rubs me the wrong way.

    Quote Originally Posted by Olivia View Post
    So, here's a good discussion topic regarding these sites. Last year, a couple lost their three year old son when he ran out onto the road chasing a frisbee. Sad. Anyway, because his mother is a blogger, someone started a GoFundMe Site for them. Now keep in mind, both parents are employed, seemingly comfortable/normal money-wise. I get that funerals, especially unexpected ones can cost a lot. So the fundraising site is fine for that. But they have raised almost $70k.

    And there has been no disclosure about where the money has gone. The mother has posted a bunch of instagram pictures of a number of vacations since his death - especially check out the one in August 2014. It must have cost a pretty penny.

    I would personally rather donate to a kid's charity.

    http://instagram.com/babyboybakery/

    http://www.gofundme.com/8xx8ao
    Me too. Ugh.
    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    Getting arrested for coke in Vegas is like being found eating a chocolate bar in the willy wonka factory.

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    Moderator bowieluva's Avatar
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    I think it goes to the 'I'm a fucking lunatic' fund.

  20. #20
    Moderator bowieluva's Avatar
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    Anyway here is an example of something that is obviously intended for family and friends:
    http://www.gofundme.com/fb5w5s

    So it's not fair to hate on these people, they're just using the site to set up gifting situation for their wedding.

  21. #21
    fun hater Shins's Avatar
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    I'm not hating on people using the site for weddings because I don't think their intention is to rip anyone off, and the money would be used for it's intended purpose.

    I do think it's tacky as hell, though.
    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    Listen, if no one cares when a crazy noodle walks in and executes children with a gun, no one cares about anything.

  22. #22
    Moderator bowieluva's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shins View Post
    I'm not hating on people using the site for weddings because I don't think their intention is to rip anyone off, and the money would be used for it's intended purpose.

    I do think it's tacky as hell, though.
    ?? it's not tacky, there's an entire section on that site specifically for weddings. They're not asking the public to donate, they're asking wedding guests, it just happens to be a site where the wedding stuff can be viewed by the public.

    My fiance and I will be using one of those honeymoon sites to solicit money for our honeymoon. Some people just don't know about them. I don't think there's anything wrong with saying 'look, I don't need towels or a blender, save your money and contribute to something that i actually meaningful.' If you look at the wording of the one I just posted above, they are specifically addressing friends and family, potential wedding guests, not outsiders.

  23. #23
    fun hater Shins's Avatar
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    I completely understand that there are people who use it for their wedding and intend for it to only be for family and friends.

    I think it's tacky to use go-fund-me for this kind of thing and I personally would not opt to do it. My opinion.

    It was always my culture/understanding that the monetary gifts people typically bring TO the wedding are for wedding costs/honeymoon. I've also known people to skip the "wedding shower" and instead have a casino themed party where people buy a sack of "chips" and the money goes towards the honeymoon.

    I just think there are like... at least 5 other ways to do that without setting up a go fund me. I'm not trying to bash you, it's just how I feel about it. Even when people go to showers and give stupid towels, they get to attend a little party or brunch in return. A website just basically gives a middle finger to the return gesture.
    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    Listen, if no one cares when a crazy noodle walks in and executes children with a gun, no one cares about anything.

  24. #24
    Moderator bowieluva's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shins View Post
    I completely understand that there are people who use it for their wedding and intend for it to only be for family and friends.

    I think it's tacky to use go-fund-me for this kind of thing and I personally would not opt to do it. My opinion.

    It was always my culture/understanding that the monetary gifts people typically bring TO the wedding are for wedding costs/honeymoon. I've also known people to skip the "wedding shower" and instead have a casino themed party where people buy a sack of "chips" and the money goes towards the honeymoon.

    I just think there are like... at least 5 other ways to do that without setting up a go fund me. I'm not trying to bash you, it's just how I feel about it. Even when people go to showers and give stupid towels, they get to attend a little party or brunch in return. A website just basically gives a middle finger to the return gesture.
    I couldn't disagree more at all. My friends and family, especially my family who live in Europe, are probably not going to attend my wedding but would like to present a gift, and this is away for them to not feel tacky about it by contributing online. It's no different to me than a registry. People who aren't attending weddings still give gifts. And they aren't doing it because they're going to 'get' something. If you attend a wedding for the swag or whatever, that's pretty classless. And a lot of people don't want to give cash on hand and feel more comfortable doing something online.

    So it is not my 'culture' at all to have people bring cash to a wedding and not a single person I know has had a wedding shower or any of that selfish 'how many gifts can we get from people' garbage, and no, I see nothing wrong with saying 'in lieu of gifts, here is a fund that is collecting all the money in one place so we can access it.' Most people I know leave on their honeymoon within a day or two of the wedding and don't have time to sit around and make sure checks clear. Paypal is a way easier method.

  25. #25
    Sana sana colita de rana beli's Avatar
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    Before the interwebz, there were car washes and a memorial shirt people made that you could buy to raise money. Now people are asking for money just because they woke up and it happened to be Monday.

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