From a blog -

Our family has been struck with an unspeakable tragedy. And we learned about it on myspace.

Glo was checking her myspace and found a comment by her Idaho cousin posted just ten minutes prior. She said she missed her brother. And loved him. "RIP Toby". RIP? Damn these kids and their flippant use of the language. But her mood avatar? 'empty'.

Glo goes to Toby's myspace. A comment by a friend says he'll miss him - "RIP buddy". Oh shit.

The frantic phone calls begin to my family in Idaho. My brother. My sister. I reach my brother to find out that Toby indeed was dead. At 21 fucking years old, his life was so damn tragic that he took his life. I'm devastated. I'm angry. Angry that he would take such a selfish way out. Angry that he was so alone that he felt that only putting a gun to his head would bring relief. I can't begin to know how my sister feels.

When Toby and his older sister were little, they stayed with us for five weeks one summer while their parents sorted out a divorce. Monica was 8, Nicole 5 and Hope and Toby about two and a half. I probably gave those two nightmares....I'm sure I wasn't the perfect aunt. I remember we would get the the four of them tucked down for the night including two toddler diaper changes. We'd plop down on the couch, breathing a big sigh, head back, eyes closed....and there would be Toby. Standing there. Watching us. Back to bed he'd go, often to boomerang back several more times before finally giving into exhaustion. We called him 'the creeper'. I remember getting in his face once, scolding him about something that seemed so important at the time. He smiled at me and I got angrier..... until I realized I was wearing a blue facial mask. How absurd that must have seemed to a toddler.

He grew up...and up and up....At 6'9 he was 3 months older and a full foot and a half taller than Hope. Size 16 feet. And that boy could hug. When he would hug you, you felt hugged. I wish to God I could hug him again. Then I'd slap the shit out of him for not finding a better way to deal. He left his sister alone and his parents crushed. Please people, hug your kids. Today is my dad's birthday - he would have been 90. I'm hoping he could use one of Toby's hugs about now.



"and if you want this world to see a better day
will you carry the words of love with you
will you ride the great white bird into heaven?"

Toby Choquette
February 18, 1988 - April 16, 2009

Added... this quote, directly off his myspace page. Pretty damn prophetic:

"I see life as a gift, and I don't intend on wasting it." Life is amazing! Live it, for you. Just Do It! Have fun, go crazy. You only have one to live. Why live to be excepted by only a few? That's how I look at it anyway, and that's how I live it. I'm free now and my life means so much more to me now than before.