From a blog -

One of my closest friends, Pedro Garcia, comitted suicide on Tuesday afternoon.



I found out Wednesday morning and later that day found out how.



I had come to school and was sitting in a classroom upstairs and maybe 5 minutes later two of my friends, Devon and Dominique, came in and I said hi and Devon was like, "Do you still hang out with that group?" to which I knew she was referring to the lot of freshmen, sophomores, and the juniors I grew up with and I said no and she was all, "Cuz something bad happened, like, death bad". At this point I didn't know what to think so I asked what happened and she said, "You know Pedro... he comitted suicide." I was so shocked. Dominique ran out to the balcony crying and Devon followed... I just sat there in utter shock and disbelief. Then when no one was outside I went out on the balcony and called Brandon and before I could even tell him was when I broke down so badly and cried. We talked for maybe 15 minutes and Dominique had come out and sat next to me and held my hand and we cried together. That morning my whole world went chaotic.



I went to first period numb and blank, and sat outside for awhile too, and a few people asked what happened and it was so hard to tell some of them...



Second period flat out killed me. When I saw my best friend, Zach, I just ran up to him and buried my face in his chest and cried so hard, the hardest I have this whole time. He just wrapped his arms around me and held tight while I cried and after, like, 5 minutes of that he walked me to the locker doors and I just went in and dumped my shit and went back out then when Zach came out I cried more on his shoulder. We did play tennis for PE though, so I felt a little better for the time being.



At break I found out about grief counseling and near the end I called Daddy to tell him the news and I hella broke down and he started crying too which made it worse and then Natalya started crying next to me and she hugged me and it helped.



My entire third period was spent in counseling with 13 other kids I know, including my closer friends. It was hard to see some of them cry. I didn't cry though. We all had so many good memories to share; it was really nice and comforting.



Fourth period was just gaiee. Honestly. I'm not even going into that.



The remainder of my day was just... numb I guess. We still had softball tryouts to go to afterschool and I really didn't want to but I still did. It was all right. Nothing's fun when you're sad.



Then I went home and slept till about 9:30 then called Brandon since today's one year and we talked, and I cried, and we laughed, and just all those different emotions. It was nice. We ended up talking for forever and passed midnight easily and it just felt surreal. Like, wow, I made it to a year with somebody. That hasn't happened in awhile for me. But I'm glad I got there with Brandon and I've come to truly and dearly love that boy. We've been through so much and it's made us strong. <3



Today I didn't cry at all; I think I'm going through the disbelief stage. Like, none of this is real. I feel a ton of regret because the last time I ever saw Pedro was Monday or Friday when he passed me and said hi and my last words ever to him were, "Hi Pedro". That tears me up so badly inside. The last time I'll ever get to talk to him and see him will be when I see him sleeping peaceably at the viewing. =[



The memorial and funeral and such are as follows:

Visitation will be on Monday Februay 2, from 4-9pm with a Vigil at 7pm at Smith Manor Grace Chapel.
Mass of Christian Burial will be on February 3, at 11am at St. Joachim's Catholic Church.

Final Resting Place will be at Calvary Cemetery in Madera.



I miss that kid so much; he was barely 18 and was seriously like my big brother. I love him so much and I wish I could've told him that before it was too late.



R.I.P. Pedro Garcia

1/20/91 - 1/27/09

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