http://mydeathspace.com/article/2006/05/05/Danielle_Chucka_s_(17)_cause_of_death_is_undetermi ned
Going back to the old "undetermined" ones again....
http://64.233.169.104/search?q=cache:ye00Zcwa4FEJ:profile.myspace.com/index.cfm%3Ffuseaction%3Duser.viewprofile%26friend ID%3D116407286+%22Danielle+Chucka%22&hl=en& ;ct=clnk&cd=1&gl=us&client=safari
Danielle Marie Chucka 10/03/88-2/23/06 It is difficult to summarize Danielle's life and personality in such a short space, it would actually take a novel to describe the amazing, interesting, and sometimes tumultuous life she led, but I will try to describe her as best I can. I remember meeting Danielle at the Turner Club when I was eight or nine, playing Barbie dolls in the locker room with her and Megan Schanter. For whatever reason, we had no clothes for the Barbies, so we played with them being completey nude. We all thought it was hilarious as little girls who could not help but giggle at plastic boobs and crotches before Mattel introduced that tacky molded underwear as a necessary addition to make Barbie's naked body tasteful for young children. From that day foward, something between Danielle and I just clicked. She had this ridiculous sense of humor, even from that age, that you could not help but smile at, whether she was purposely making a fool of herself for people to laugh at or just making absurd or sarcastic comments.
Danielle was never afraid to laugh at herself, either, showing that crooked , uneven-tooth smile when she did and often drooling, a habit that would attract ridicule while also giving her an innocent, childish air throughout her life, no matter how tough and mature she tried to act.
Even later when she entered her gothic stage with her black clothing, expertly arched eyebrows, and short, blood red hair, it was hard to take her seriously once her old ways betrayed her and she drooled as she laughed uncontrollably. But back in those days when we were still little, however, Danielle's hair was actually insanely long and it became a daily ritual for Megan, Jill, Krystina, Allison, and I to take turns fighting with the knots and tangles after a day spent swimming in the pool. This one time, however, there was one knot that none of us could defeat for days and it only accumulated more volume as we deperately attacked it, pulling out chunks of hair we hid from her view while doing so. My mom tried her turn, Allison's grandma poured conditioner in it, but to now avail. And that is when she began crying when it was aparent their was nothing anyone could do to save her long mane.
Danielle was always unconventional and took pride in being different, as did I. We got along just fine, though, both of us being somewhat outcasts, because we had eachother to confide in, even at times when being an oddball in separate Catholic schools got tough. And as we got older, the two of us became closer. We would dress as crazy as we could, bright colors, bizarre makeup, pink hairdye. I would try to dress like Gwen Stefani and Danielle would dress up in her sister's old raver clothes. Sometimes we would show up like this when she dragged me to Teen Center at OLA, the two of us looking like we wer from another decade, where Danielle would always request Nirvana no matter how many times the DJ would reject her musical taste. That was one thing about Chucka, she was always persistent and would never back down, to anyone, which sometimes got her into trouble. Sometimes kids would make fun of us and call us "hippies" and "freaks," but we always got those kids back with our own intelligent wit. In a weird way, that torment gave us pride in being "strange" and made us aspire to be stranger. Danielle went through so many hard times as we were growing up, but she always managed to pull through. She was stronger than anyone I have ever known, male or female. And throughout it all, she still managed to stay motivated, keeping up in her classes and maintaining interest in culture outside of school through literature and art.
We would sit in my room for hours, listening to the radio, playing Super Nintendo, writing stories, and creating collaborative art projects when we were still in elementary school. At these times we spent alone, I could sense all the terrible torturous things she was suffering and it killed me inside. There were times i could not get into contact with her because her phone had been turned off, so I would just have to show up on her doorstep. At that time, she became an almost adopted member of my family and she came everywhere I went. I would never stop worrying about her from that period on, whether I was subconsciously being protective over her or just blatantly scolding her, leading to drunken yelling matches when we got older. Around 2001, we began growing up. And Danielle began to become more gothic by the day, teetering on obsession with finding acceptable fashion in the village and on ebay and other internet stores, often having her accounts put on probabtion or cancelled due to her shopaholic addiction and her inability to pay for it as a junior high student. At times, I would try and intervene in this, but Danielle was always a rabid shopper and telling her that she didn't need that new Marilyn Manson lunch box was often futile.
During this period, Fallon, a few years deep into her transition from Long Island to the Bronx, introduced our group to a whole new crowd, a critical point that would determine the course of our teenage lives and lead to later ups and downs for all of us. We began meeting new people and going to local shows, where Danielle would freely critique the terrible fashion choices of concert-goers and openly show her disgust for bands that sounded like shit. We began hanging out with Fallon's friends from Lehman and her boy of interest at the time, Mike, and his band, the Kezners. For Danielle's thirteenth birthday that year, we all decided it was time for us to start drinking, and so we celebrated Danielle's entrance into teenage-dom by getting some creepy old man outside of Little Lizzie's to buy us Corona's, obviously Fallon's job. All of us were there, including Black Christina.
Most of us only had one or two beers, but, Danielle, as the birthday girl, drank about a six pack plus for herself and wound up puking shortly after as Kevin continued to pretend to be drunker than her. After that, we began to attend those stereotypical teenage high school parties regularly, most of them taking place after spending hours at shows in places like Rumors and Luca's. Our group eventually became dubbed the "Fallon Crew," a title that conjured up mixed feelings for most people. But we didn't care, we were young and naieve, so what did we have to worry about?
Often times, Danielle and I wound up wandering the neighborhood together nightly, drunk, sober, high, whatever. We would climb the fences of the cemetery and frolic in the old graveyard, roam from people's houses, locate the bizarros in front of 7-11, show up at Mike's house, burst in Fallon's front door, and on. Throughout all we had experienced, Danielle was still always there for me. No matter what, I could always count on her and I knew that she would forever be the truest friend I ever had.
However, as she went on from OLA to IS192 and then to Lehman, I once again had that terrible worrying sensation for her that eventually lead to a harsh, yet hilarious drunken fight between her and I as Fallon instigated between us. It ended with a burning cigarette being thrown into my hair and her falling into some hedges. That was pretty much the first and last big fight we ever had, despite the many little drunken brawls we had later on. I was just worried about her and talked down to her like she was a child, and Danielle, the rebelious spirit she was, would have none of my authoratative demands to be more responsible and careful.
Through those early to mid teenage years, the interaction with members of the opposite sex during shows and parties sparked our cheesy teenage girl interest in boys, something that would lead all of us in slightly different directions.
To this day, I remember Danielle first becoming interested in that creature who would lead her to her end. Thinking about it now, I just wish I could go back and stop their relationship before it began, but it's too late now. I was excited for her at first, being the first serious relationship she would have, besides when she went out with Louie back when we were young for about 6 days before he turned gay, and then later on with Mazolla for about three days. But as it progressed, it became apparent to me that he was no good for her. He wasn't good for those around her either, as he threatened violence towards a few of our friends and even my boyfriend at the time. Though I would try to voice my opinion of him as gently as possible when the too of us were alone, she would simply dismiss it as no big deal. The times when they were broken up always comforted me about her wellbeing.
I remember as I was leaving for my first year at college, still being worried about her, as it would be the first time in ten years we were separated for monthes at a time.
A few monthes later when news that they were once again seeing eachother and rumors of his activities spread to me, I became so upset that I cried, but I never told her.
Why did he have to take advantage of her, of all the terrible things she experienced like that? That wasn't the first nor the last time that the way he used her and abused his power over her would bring me to tears. It happened, too, that summer before I went to school after she told me a disturbing story about something he had done, and then two years later when she would die by his hands, when most people were unaware of them seeing eachother again, especially since Danielle had been forbidden to ever go near him again by close family and friends.
After everything Danielle had gone through, after all the hardships she had conquered and what she had made of them, Danielle deserved to live more than anyone. She was going to be a Freshman journalism major at Oneonta this year. She also planned to teach for some time and go to grad school. But now all those plans will never be completed.
I remember when Kevin met me on the stairwell to my dorm last semetser, pale and expressionless, just repeating that he had to tell me something. I tried to force it out of him, and all he revealed was that it was about Danielle. I kept questioning him until we reached my room and he sat me down, uttering those unthinable words. "I don't believe you, I don't believe you..." I kept saying and looked at my phone that was on silent because I had just gotten out of class. On it I saw a list of missed calls from people from home who I hadn't spoken to in weeks, some even monthes and, at that sight, immediately began to sob uncontrollably for two days straight. My sidekick for all these years was gone and I could not believe it. Danielle was so beautiful, so strong, so unique, so talented, such a true friend to everyone.
I hope everyone remembers her that way forever. And I hope that her death does not go unpunished. We all love her and miss her so much that there is nothing I can say to express the pain all of us have felt during these last few monthes. All we have left of her now is eachother. -Love, Rachel (Rachmaster)
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