Am i morbid?

[llife00]

When i first came to this site, i was very interested in some specific deaths (such as chip ellis and others), and researched them. I even cried because of the sadness that could be seen throughout the victims families and such. Now it just seems like no one even cares anymore. statistics and making fun of the way people died and so on. I do it too now so i am not judging... but does anyone else share this reaction? was anyone else extremely saddened/interested by/in this site upon discovery, but is now apathetic?

[RIPdavid1989]

yea, i guess i'm kinda like that. At first i was like, omg, look at all these young people being shot, or stabbed...etc. But then after being on here for a while, i'm just like, wow, that sucks, then i get over it pretty quick. hardtimes

[Niffy]

I guess because it was something different, it's only natural it was shocking at first. It's still shocking now but yea I guess you're right, it has become less so. I don't think it's caused people to make fun of deaths though, certainly not in my case anyway. I find this place very interesting but find it awkward when people make disrespectful comments.

[LLL]

yes, I had the EXACT same reaction. I wad so depressed for days when I found this site, I researched the deaths, looked at their pages forever, talked to my friends about it. But now, I don't even remember who I was so upset about. Now, unless the death really hits close to home (not physically but a death that say could happen to me or a loved one) then I am really just superficial about the whole thing. I wonder if we are desensitized to death? or just the deaths on mydeathspace because we are familiar with the format? Also, have you noticed only females have replied to this thread?

[wordman262]

People joke at funerals...I hate that they do, but it's a way to ease tension. It's also said that making jokes about death is a way of thumbing our noses at the Grim Reaper.

As for me, if I find myself making light of something I've seen on this site (and I have), it's usually to keep myself from crying.

[Widget]

What I find interesting is the outporing of grief shown for people in the media, Princess Diana* and Steve Irwin* as examples. From a personal standpoint I think I have become desensitized to death to a degree, not just from visiting MDS, but from using the internet as a whole. I'm not saying that I blame the internet for desensitizing me, but my knowledge of death pre-internet was what the media told me, nowadays I can choose to see images that are not generally available in the mainstream media and at first I was shocked, and a little sickened, but my curiosity got the better of me and I couldn't help but look! (although I have been sent some pictures from rotten.com that have threatened my delicate constitution)

Widg

*I'm not bashing them so please don't bash this noob!

[galileosrv]

it's sad to say that these people are not with us anymore.. even though we dont know them personally, they touch other lives in a way...

[holly]

[quote author=llife00 link=topic=1503.msg51315#msg51315 date=1158433792]
When i first came to this site, i was very interested in some specific deaths (such as chip ellis and others), and researched them. I even cried because of the sadness that could be seen throughout the victims families and such. Now it just seems like no one even cares anymore. statistics and making fun of the way people died and so on. I do it too now so i am not judging... but does anyone else share this reaction? was anyone else extremely saddened/interested by/in this site upon discovery, but is now apathetic?
[/quote]

Speaking of Chip Ellis, there was an article in my paper today.  It seems they are seeking the death penalty for the kid who killed him:
http://timesdispatch.com/servlet/Satellite?pagename=RTD/MGArticle/RTD_BasicArticle&c=MGArticle&cid=114919065 3402

But yes, in reply to your post, I think this website makes you have a thick skin.  It makes death seem more real overall, but it just doesn't affect me at all like it used to.

[BlessedBe]

[quote author=LLL link=topic=1503.msg51332#msg51332 date=1158435042]
yes, I had the EXACT same reaction. I wad so depressed for days when I found this site, I researched the deaths, looked at their pages forever, talked to my friends about it. But now, I don't even remember who I was so upset about. Now, unless the death really hits close to home (not physically but a death that say could happen to me or a loved one) then I am really just superficial about the whole thing. I wonder if we are desensitized to death? or just the deaths on mydeathspace because we are familiar with the format? Also, have you noticed only females have replied to this thread?
[/quote]

Me too...I was consumed for days.  I couldn't even think about work when I was I work...I even made a stupid decision and  contacted a friend of one of the deceased.  I haven't transitioned into the apathetic stage yet but suprisingly, I feel it's coming.  And I did notice that the majority of the members here are women on the site. 

[Broken Epiphany]

where is the mds link?

[wayneszoo6]

[quote author=llife00 link=topic=1503.msg51315#msg51315 date=1158433792]
When i first came to this site, i was very interested in some specific deaths (such as chip ellis and others), and researched them. I even cried because of the sadness that could be seen throughout the victims families and such. Now it just seems like no one even cares anymore. statistics and making fun of the way people died and so on. I do it too now so i am not judging... but does anyone else share this reaction? was anyone else extremely saddened/interested by/in this site upon discovery, but is now apathetic?
[/quote]
I hate to say this--- But is this why MDS has the reputation it does!?!?!  :-(Just a thought!!

[holly]

[quote author=Broken Epiphany link=topic=1503.msg51374#msg51374 date=1158443366]
where is the mds link?
[/quote]

If you're talking about Chip Ellis, here:

http://mydeathspace.com/deaths.aspx?ctl00_MainContent_Weblogs1_show=8d93e8 71-8f7a-462a-8643-814356984b4a

[M_Sinistrari]

I wouldn't quite say we're desensitized, but become more realist when it comes to death.

The average person really doesn't think about death until it happens near them, and even then it's heavily glossed over.  Best way I can describe it is it's a denial of the inevitible, they don't want to know.  We're different in that we're curious and honest about that curiousness.  We also see the same trends those in the medical and law enforcement branches see, and like them to keep from being overwhelmed by the numbers, we crack jokes.

Of course to anyone who's in the 'don't think about it' category would naturally think we're being sick or whathaveya.

[holly]

[quote author=M_Sinistrari link=topic=1503.msg51416#msg51416 date=1158456217]
I wouldn't quite say we're desensitized, but become more realist when it comes to death.

The average person really doesn't think about death until it happens near them, and even then it's heavily glossed over.Â* Best way I can describe it is it's a denial of the inevitible, they don't want to know.Â* We're different in that we're curious and honest about that curiousness.Â* We also see the same trends those in the medical and law enforcement branches see, and like them to keep from being overwhelmed by the numbers, we crack jokes.

Of course to anyone who's in the 'don't think about it' category would naturally think we're being sick or whathaveya.


[/quote]

Exactly. I've met many morticians and they all have great senses of humor.  They are confronted with death each day and if they let each death get to them, they'd never make it - it'd just eat away at them.  It's not that we're being sick, but sometimes you just have to crack jokes or find humor just to cope.  This site has helped me grow that sort of thick skin and such for when I graduate mortuary school...

[wayneszoo6]

Are you really going to mortuary school? One of my best friends is a mortitian!! I hang out at the funeral home all the time!! It's funny how he is two people!! One at the funeral home and another outside of there!!

[holly]

Haha your exclamation points make me giggle... yep, 1 year left  :-)  I love morticians... they're great!

[wayneszoo6]

There CRAZY is more like it!! My friend grew up in the business!! None of his 3 kids have followed in his footsteps though!!

[holly]

[quote author=Waynes Zoo!! link=topic=1503.msg51445#msg51445 date=1158464285]
There CRAZY is more like it!! My friend grew up in the business!! None of his 3 kids have followed in his footsteps though!!
[/quote]

You calling me crazy??    Yeah, I'm the first in my family to chose it, and they all think I'm crazy.

[wayneszoo6]

I don't think I would have the stomach for it!! The compassion, but not the stomach!!

[llife00]

another death that really got to me was Austin Stewart. visit his myspace and read his girlfriend's comments. i was really surprised to see that no one posted a thread about how sad it was. he seemed like a nice kid. he and his girlfriend had a lot of love.

[llife00]

[quote author=llife00 link=topic=1503.msg51458#msg51458 date=1158466618]
another death that really got to me was Austin Stewart. visit his myspace and read his girlfriend's comments. i was really surprised to see that no one posted a thread about how sad it was. he seemed like a nice kid. he and his girlfriend had a lot of love.
[/quote]

i couldnt find the link to his mds, but here's his myspace.
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid =23090831

[llife00]

oops

[number9]

i guess because i've always been fascinated by death, suicide, crime, murder, etc this site hasn't changed my point of view in any way. or made me more apathetic at all.
i watch a lot of tv about it, read books, etc. this is just another way to study, and a more fascinating one at that.  :-)
i've only been to a couple funerals that my dad and i didn't crack a joke at some point. it's coping for some people.
on this site, i think the outrageous or insensitive comments are 99% for attention.
just my .2

[Niffy]

Interesting point re. the mass grieving of celebs etc. Personally it makes me feel extremely awkward, and even cringe.

I don't mean that in an insensitive way, I see the deaths as tragic and often shocking when it's people who are constantly in the limelight. However when I see hundreds of people on the news crying their eyes out for Princess Di/Steve Irwin etc I find it very hard to understand.

Also the way people see this site as wrong etc, merely for it's nature. I have a few friends who say it's 'sick', I'm 'weird' for looking at it, when they've never even looked themselves, they're merely making judgement on the nature of the site. I think it's got alot to do with the western traditions of - like someone said - brushing death under the carpet - making it taboo etc.

I was watching a programme in a recent uni lecture about the culture of the indonesian people. They have a totally differnet approach to death, funerals really are a celebration of life, rather than a mourning. I think the way we automatically associate death = mourning means we are apprehensive about reading/researching anything to do with death.

That said, how many people who condemn this site watch documentaries about death related topics? Like as if it's morally OK to be interested if you are spoonfed this information by a mainstream media, yet you take the effort to do a littel research of your own and suddenly you're in taboo territory....Â* :roll:

[chloeluz]

I can't help but feel guilty about reading this site. I'm addicted and feel weird about it.