zee and ang know their shit. it doesn't start with physical abuse. it starts with them controlling you in other ways. they remove you from your support system, they cut you down and make you feel like trash, they manipulate the shit outta you after you already trust and respect them.
if anyone ever did that shit to me i would sure as hell start them on fire, but my own life experiences put me in a position to sniff out abusers before anyone could ever let that on. i know to trust my gut. i see the red flags. i probably don't call 'em all right every time but honey, 'self preservation is a full time occupation.'
My friends little sister "Kathy" married a really nice guy. We'll call him "Billy." Billy was great until one night he came home drunk and knocked Kathy around for a while before passing out. When he woke up K had soaked his clothing with lighter fluid, tied him to the bed and was holding a gun on him. She explained that she loved him, but... the next time he hit her, he'd better kill her cause she'd kill him before she'd let him treat her like a punching bag again. She left then and sent her brothers over to untie him a few hours later.
They're still married 20 years later, but Billy doesn't drink much these days, and when he does, he's smart enough not to come home.
Sadly, most women who end up trapped don't fight back, or wait way to long to leave.
"It's the salt water that changes the Rainbow's pretty colors to gray." "And his colors never come back?" "No, once he's been to the sea he's changed forever. The Steelhead can come back home here, stay for the rest of his days, and live among the other Rainbow trout, but he'll always be different because of where he's been." Morsi, Pamela. Garters.
You're entitled to your own opinions. You're not entitled to your own facts.- D. Moynihan
You have to take into consideration where some people come from, what they have experienced, and the abuse they have put up with in their past - particularly with family. We all have our own ways of dealing with extreme stress and tragedy, and some are obviously emotionally stronger and more capable than others. It's just a sad fact. If you "developed" in an environment where abusive behavior becomes the norm it makes it that much easier (for some) to be susceptible to these types of relationships in your future. It's along the same lines of why some people become addicts and some people would never dream of it.
Also, none of that is an excuse for the behavior or putting up with abuse repeatedly (especially of a physical nature). It's just how it is. Why are there men that feel the need to berate, belittle, and beat on women in the first place?
I just don't understand how these people always seem to find each other. If I were an abuser I'd be even more forever alone than I am now, cause I NEVER meet someone that would tolerate this shit. Or maybe I have and I just dont' know it, cause the entire concept is so foreign to me. I really need to read into it some more cause I need to understand this.
Why do people care if you dont want to go out? I get that we are good friends but we are going out next weekend. UGH! I have a kid and dont need to go clubbing every fucking weekend.
ron_nyc: I don't like the black ones much.
The trick is to really leave and not go back. Sadly, a lot of people who get involved with abusive men or women don't secretly believe they can do better or will find someone who will love them that much again. Because there's this fucked up thing that says the angrier you make someone, the more they must care. They don't realize that person would have the same relationship with any woman.
You slept with mike so he would ban me. change your sig..the pretentious look how hipster face is so old ooh you like guys with glasses..ooooh
Surgery in 6 hours. I cant sleep. Im nervous.
kidney stone removal. in and out, no big. But Ive never had surgery before, so Im kinda butterfly-ie
Better hope MDS stays around for your time off. Are they cutting or zapping?
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