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Thread: Jade Richardson (26) died from a drug overdose and she asked to be submitted to MyDeathSpace in the event of her passing

  1. #101
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    Quote Originally Posted by salmon.heart View Post
    I have a funny story that?s more funny now that time has passed. Jade was in the hospital for years. I didn?t see her or speak to her except for the one time she was out for what seemed like days (maybe it was) and was sent back for a year and a half. I spoke to Stephanie a lot on the phone, learning about her diagnosis and how she was doing. I don?t remember if this was the first time she was out or when she actually got out, but we had plans to hang out and I was so excited to see her. She called me and told me she was going to AA and if I wanted to come. I don?t want to be too obvious but I thought she said a two syllable name that begins with A. A and I do not get along. I was hurt and shocked she would even ask if I?d rather hang out with her and A than just us two like we planned and annoyed because A was not a person she needed to see after getting out of rehab. I told her I wasn?t going to go and the next day at school I swallowed my pride and asked A how Jade was. She looked confused and asked me what I meant. I told her Jade told me she?d be with her the night before and A?s reaction is a flashbulb memory to this day. She bent her knees, eyes widened, stuck her rear out and put her arms straight out like she was going to fly. ?JADE?S BACK?? & she literally swooped away. Later on that day Jade told me she had said A A, not A?s name. We laughed but it took me a long time to forgive myself because A found out because of me and went to see her and smoke and do who knows what with her. I wish I knew how to make photos work on here so I could draw a photo of the way she reacted.
    I reeeeally wish I knew who you were talking about so that I could get a better mental picture of this, lol; I can't even really visualize how someone does something like this, or why. Where did she swoop to??

  2. #102
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    Quote Originally Posted by salmon.heart View Post
    Also, does anyone have any idea why I can?t see the photos Stephanie is posting?
    That was totally my fault; I'm an idiot. I had my album set to private for some reason, and since I copied the image link from the album, I was still clearly able to see my own photos, while no one else could, lol. Sorry about that; it should work now.

  3. #103
    Quote Originally Posted by stephanie_says View Post
    That was totally my fault; I'm an idiot. I had my album set to private for some reason, and since I copied the image link from the album, I was still clearly able to see my own photos, while no one else could, lol. Sorry about that; it should work now.
    At least it wasn?t just me. I like how everyone else was too polite to say anything lmaoo

  4. #104
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    Quote Originally Posted by salmon.heart View Post
    At least it wasn?t just me. I like how everyone else was too polite to say anything lmaoo
    I feel like I've been robbing people of their MDS experience of Jade, lol, so I'm glad you mentioned it. Although, to be fair, it took a second person saying it for me to be like, "Hmmm.. hold on a second.." Anyway, glad I took care of that, and now you can feel confident posting pictures, as well, lol.

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    I was talking to Stephanie last night, and the subject of Lana Del Rey came up. I started laughing because I have a really funny story about Jade that involves a Lana Del Rey song that I wanted to share.

    One Thursday night after Jade got out of the Iron Cactus, she asked if I wanted to come hang out. I went over to her place, and got a little stoned, and the subject turned to music. I was sharing a picture that I still have on my phone from SXSW 2014 of Slash and Robby Krieger of The Doors playing dueling solos on Red House by Hendrix. I told her that Guns N' Roses is my all-time favorite band, and my stepfather's favorite band was The Doors so that moment was this huge connection for me. She gives me a grin that, in retrospect, can only be classified as "shit-eating."

    "Have you ever heard 'Axl Rose Husband' by Lana Del Rey?" she asked.

    "No! But I'd love to!" I knew LDR loved GN'R and was even romantically linked to Axl back about five years ago.

    I embedded the link to the song above, but if it doesn't work, here's the link.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S2PoR8uUxo0

    I was expecting some kind of heavy blues-rock similar to Guns. What I got was three minutes of pure, unbridled creepiness from LDR. Between the opening chords that sound like the intro to a slasher flick, LDR's distant, almost muted voice, and a choir that sounds like a haunting, I was already uncomfortable about a minute in.

    "Jade, what is this?" I asked. She kept smiling, but said nothing.

    Remember in Beavis and Butthead when Beavis would start freaking out about how much he didn't like something, but Butthead would just make him stew in it just to agitate him further? Yeah, that was us. We get two minutes into Axl Rose Husband, and I'm tapping out.

    "Alright Jade, I...I think I've had enough."

    Her grin only got bigger kinda like Willy Wonka in the boat scene with the psychedelics. She turned it up full blast on me. I was less than amused.

    The song ended a minute later, and I'm visibly uncomfortable. That's the creepiest song I think I've ever heard.

    "What did you think?" Jade asked. She's still smiling, quite pleased that she's scared the crap out of me.

    "That...that was really creepy! And unsettling," I stammered.

    She leaned in closer to me. "Yeah...so was Axl Rose."

    Touche, Jade. Well played.

    I'm going to write about her birthday, but I will need some time on that one. I wanted to share this story with others because I started laughing like hell when I told Stephanie last night. It's a fun memory where she got one over on me big-time.

  6. #106
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    You may not be aware of this, but Jade actually did celebrate her 27th birthday. I can explain.

    One night in late June of this year, I was beginning to wind down for the night. I changed into my PJ's, and was half-heartedly scrolling through Facebook & half-heartedly watching Sportscenter when I saw a post on Facebook for a Suggested Event. It was a for a local tea company called Unitea & they were hosting a fundraising party to get them to Burning Man. I don't drink a lot of tea & I've never been to Burning Man, but something told me to click on the Event. I did, and the fundraising party had a theme called A Journey to the Mad Hatter's Mind.

    I looked at the date of the party & as soon as I did, my inner monologue changed gender.

    "Oh My God! You have to take me!"

    The voice definitely wasn't mine. It was female & sounded absolutely excited. It also sounded incredibly familiar. I looked at the date again. Just to make sure, I went to Stephanie's Facebook to see if I could confirm what I thought. I found the program from Jade's funeral for confirmation. The Alice In Wonderland event was slated for Jade's birthday, July 7.

    I knew what I heard. "Oh My God! You have to take me!"

    Every hair on my body, even hair I didn't know I had, stood up at once. I wasn't scared at all, but I have to tell you something. Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment your inner monologue is hijacked even if it is during the latest LeBron James free agency segment on Sportscenter. I send screenshots of the event to Stephanie to give her a heads-up, and we both remarked that it was crazy.

    July 7 rolled up like any other Saturday for me. I woke up around 8 AM, poured some coffee, got some breakfast tacos and a workout in. But after all that, I also made a stop at Walgreen's. I never go to Walgreen's, but I had this picture saved to my phone.



    I chose that one for sentimental reasons. I had Walgreen's blow this up to an 11x14 so it would be easy enough to see if others were holding it up.

    Here's the thing about this fundraiser. This was more like a rave than a formal event. They didn't announce the location until the day of the event. I was mapping it out & it was actually in a wooded area behind a neighborhood in far south Austin. I drove down from far north Austin & found a side street in the neighborhood to park on that was appropriately named Lunar. I followed the instructions to get to the party. I literally had to hurdle a barricade with a camera and Jade's picture in tow. Jade's obituary said that she was going to find curious adventures in Wonderland, but I'm not sure that was intended to be literal. But on her birthday it was.

    I paid the admission, and found that the tea company set up all kinds of psychedelic projections along with multiple paths lit up with Christmas lights. I immediately sought out people who were already dressed up, and explained what I was doing. I showed them the picture, and explained that this is Jade. She loved Alice In Wonderland. She would be here today if she could. She would be 27 today, and that she belonged with all of them. And they agreed...she absolutely belonged with them.







    But it wasn't just the people in Wonderland that I knew Jade wanted to see. I thought she might like to be a part of the surroundings too. Starting at the makeshift bar...



    At the chessboard with tea...



    Even at the DJ's computer...



    The tea company set up a designated chill area in the forest, and I retreated there for a bit because I was pouring sweat and covered in bugs. Seriously. I picked a ladybug out of my belly button. As I was in the chill area, I got to talking to one young lady that was back there too. We got to talking about the significance of the picture I had, and thought it was really sweet. Then she introduced herself.

    "Hi, my name is Luna."

    I don't even recall giving her my name. "There's no fucking way..." I thought. I told her that was Jade's daughter's name, but before we could get too much further, the whole setup in the forest had a power surge. The breakers broke, and all power was lost to the party. I thought that was probably an appropriate time to make my exit from the party. I'm not sure I could top that moment, anyway.

    I got home and downloaded all the pictures. I really wanted to see if I could get them all to Stephanie on July 7. I missed by three minutes. I got ready for bed, but before I crashed, I read Stephanie's reply back to me. I went to bed with a smile on my face knowing how happy I made both Jade and Stephanie.

  7. #107
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    Quote Originally Posted by sowb.5151 View Post
    I got home and downloaded all the pictures. I really wanted to see if I could get them all to Stephanie on July 7. I missed by three minutes. I got ready for bed, but before I crashed, I read Stephanie's reply back to me. I went to bed with a smile on my face knowing how happy I made both Jade and Stephanie.
    This was such an awesome thing for you to have done. I still don't even know what to say besides thank you. Truly.

  8. #108
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    Quote Originally Posted by stephanie_says View Post
    This was such an awesome thing for you to have done. I still don't even know what to say besides thank you. Truly.
    Well, the pictures didn't show up. They did in the preview, but they didn't make it here. This sucks. I'm going to have to play with this to see what's possible. I didn't see an option to add just the pictures saved on my computer. It made me put in the URL, but no other option that I could find for uploading. Grrr...I apologize. This is rather embarrassing.

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    WOW! That is so freaking awesome! Jade truly would've loved that. I can only imagine how she'd be if she were there.
    You really are kind, thank you!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jesslynnxox View Post
    WOW! That is so freaking awesome! Jade truly would've loved that. I can only imagine how she'd be if she were there.
    You really are kind, thank you!
    Hi Jess & thank you! Question for you: Can you see the pics? I can?t but wasn?t sure if others could.

  11. #111
    Quote Originally Posted by sowb.5151 View Post
    Hi Jess & thank you! Question for you: Can you see the pics? I can?t but wasn?t sure if others could.
    I can't see them. :( I'm about to post one specifically for you.

  12. #112
    sowb.5151, I wanted you to have these. I was really angry at anyone who enabled her along the way until I read your post and Stephanie's response. I can tell you cared about her because you capture her so well, especially when you talked about her finding the kitty.






  13. #113
    If you make an account on tinypic.com it'll give you a message board link to copy paste & should work for you. I tried uploading an album on here and it wouldn't work for some reason.

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    [IMG][/IMG]








  15. #115
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    Quote Originally Posted by salmon.heart View Post
    If you make an account on tinypic.com it'll give you a message board link to copy paste & should work for you. I tried uploading an album on here and it wouldn't work for some reason.
    It worked! At least I think it did. I can see them now. Can everyone else?

  16. #116
    Quote Originally Posted by sowb.5151 View Post
    It worked! At least I think it did. I can see them now. Can everyone else?
    I can. Thank you for these.

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    [IMG][/IMG]






  18. #118
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    Quote Originally Posted by salmon.heart View Post
    sowb.5151, I wanted you to have these. I was really angry at anyone who enabled her along the way until I read your post and Stephanie's response. I can tell you cared about her because you capture her so well, especially when you talked about her finding the kitty.





    Thank you for the pics & the many kind words. I know y'all were the best of friends going back to middle school from what it sounds like. Jade and I only knew each other less than a year so I'm kinda the stranger in all of this. But she was special, and I'm so thankful that those who loved her the most, and knew her the best have offered up forgiveness to me. I appreciate it more than you know. I was just so happy to be able to put this collage together & to share it with others. It was so much fun to do this, and I absolutely know she would have been in Austin for her birthday at this party if it was possible. I'm so happy that I gave her that chance.

  19. #119
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    Quote Originally Posted by salmon.heart View Post
    sowb.5151, I wanted you to have these. I was really angry at anyone who enabled her along the way until I read your post and Stephanie's response. I can tell you cared about her because you capture her so well, especially when you talked about her finding the kitty.





    I spent a lot of time feeling frustrated and angry, not so much towards friends who used with her, but more towards the people who WEREN'T using, that I felt were contributing to her ability to avoid fully experiencing consequences.

    I've been working hard at learning to let that go. I think we all have to make the choices that we can live with. For me, that was more along the lines of tough love. For others, who also loved her, it was completely different. I don't know anymore what is "right" and what is "wrong"; I don't know that there is such a thing. Maybe it all comes down, in the end, to just that; what each of us can live with. I know that everything I did, every choice I made, came from a place of love. I believe that other people also came from a place of love, even if their version looks different from mine, and even if I don't understand or agree with their version.

    Who am I to dictate what other people will be able to live with; does that make sense?

    At the end of the day, Jade always had her own choices to make, just like we all do, and I truly believe that most of us are doing the best we can, even if our best is not that great. I believe that most people, if they could do better, they would, and when they can, they do. Not EVERYONE, obviously, but most people.

    I can't stay mad at anyone for doing what felt right for them.

    I don't know if I will feel the same next week, or in a month; I'm sure I will struggle with that conflict for a long time to come. But for right now, that's where I'm at.

  20. #120
    Quote Originally Posted by stephanie_says View Post
    I spent a lot of time feeling frustrated and angry, not so much towards friends who used with her, but more towards the people who WEREN'T using, that I felt were contributing to her ability to avoid fully experiencing consequences.

    I've been working hard at learning to let that go. I think we all have to make the choices that we can live with. For me, that was more along the lines of tough love. For others, who also loved her, it was completely different. I don't know anymore what is "right" and what is "wrong"; I don't know that there is such a thing. Maybe it all comes down, in the end, to just that; what each of us can live with. I know that everything I did, every choice I made, came from a place of love. I believe that other people also came from a place of love, even if their version looks different from mine, and even if I don't understand or agree with their version.

    Who am I to dictate what other people will be able to live with; does that make sense?

    At the end of the day, Jade always had her own choices to make, just like we all do, and I truly believe that most of us are doing the best we can, even if our best is not that great. I believe that most people, if they could do better, they would, and when they can, they do. Not EVERYONE, obviously, but most people.

    I can't stay mad at anyone for doing what felt right for them.

    I don't know if I will feel the same next week, or in a month; I'm sure I will struggle with that conflict for a long time to come. But for right now, that's where I'm at.

    Exactly. Everytime I ask my self & spent time torturing myself asking what I could have done differently, everytime I must accept the answer is, "nothing." I would cry and beg her to change her course and she would always hear me out, and then proceed to do her own thing. It stuck with me forever when you and I were talking on the phone maybe 5 years ago about how frustrated I was she wouldn't just do what I said & you pointed out her abusive husband, abusive as he was, also thought he was telling her what was right for her. I don't remember the exact words but it always stuck with me that trying to control her from my end was no better than others controlling her, even if my intentions were good.

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    WOW! I am in tears, this is so badass. Happy Tears because this is just so fucking cool and she would LOVE this.
    I had the pleasure of having Luna & my other niece, Sophia, this weekend. I call them my nieces because all of us parents have been friends since middle school, well most of us. I didn't meet Jade until high school but when she was pregnant with Luna is when we became friends. That child is a lot like her dad, obviously. But some things she says and does I'm like what in the fuck, JUST LIKE I DID WITH JADE, and sometimes Stephanie too, lol. She was coming up with some weird "scenarios" but more child-like, which makes me assume she will be just as weird as her mom personality wise- but as most of you know, its a unique and good weird.
    She's also very smart. They were having a debate because Sophia said Giraffes and Long Necks are related, in which Luna responded. "Well, Long Necks are reptiles, not mammals so there is no way they're related."
    I wasn't going to intervene, I just wanted to see how it all played out while trying not to laugh.
    I asked Luna after I picked her up if she liked cats (knowing she would say yes) but she said "Yeah, who doesn't?" LOL so straight faced I couldn't help but laugh.
    I bought her some pink converse before the funeral, super glittery - something her mom would like. I asked her if she had worn them and she said no, she didn't know where her dad put them. I said oh okay, and she said she didn't like pink anyway. I said well go return them and get something you like, she said she didn't return them because it was a gift. I said okay, whats your favorite color that way when I buy you something, I know what color to get. "Black."
    I really enjoyed my weekend with both girls, Both reminding me of their moms....and their dads too. It trips me out cause I'm like wait a minute, they're only a few years of shy from when I met most of the parents. Now i'm feeling old.
    It sucks that Jade isn't here, and she will really be missed. But she sure did leave behind a mini Jade.

  22. #122
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    Jade tagged me in this screenshot of one of our conversations a couple of years ago. I'm so glad that we had these conversations, and that they obviously meant something to her.


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    I'm glad you have these memories!

  24. #124
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jesslynnxox View Post
    I'm glad you have these memories!
    Me, too. I used to get annoyed because she was always messaging instead of calling, and I would say, "Oh my God, can you please just CALL me?", lol, but now I am so grateful that I have so many of our conversations via text, messenger, etc. available in a way that our phone conversations would never have been.

  25. #125
    I know exactly what you mean, Jess. I don?t see her as often because I live in Colorado now but every time I?m like where did you get this personality? She told me she wouldn?t want to live in the mountains because she doesn?t like heights lmao.

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