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Thread: Suicide Prevention / Suicide Survivors Thread

  1. #726
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boston Babe 73 View Post
    Welcome Heliophobic! So glad you posted in here and shared your story and I'm so very sorry for your loss. You never really come to terms when someone you love commits suicide. Just know that it's not your fault and there really was nothing you could have done. People tend to blame themselves when it happens and it's not healthy. Most times even if someone does show signs, there's not much you can do if they're serious about it.

    Anyway, again welcome and thanks for sharing your experience.
    Thank you for the welcome and the kind words. I didn't blame myself, but I wish that our relationship had been different, like it would have saved him. But I've had more than one therapist and family members tell me that it would have just delayed the inevitable. It's a terrible way of looking at it, but maybe they're right? I don't know. I have my own past with mental illness and suicide attempts. While the suicide attempts are(hopefully)in the past, I'll be dealing with mental illness for the rest of my life. Since I have experience with feeling as low as you can get and the fact that I've always been an empath, I'm good at talking to friends that get suicidally low. I dated a guy who also has experience with feeling suicidal, but he's pro-suicide and would never give someone in need any hope or kind words. I can't wrap my brain around that kind of thinking. Thank goodness I don't speak to him anymore.

  2. #727
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    Quote Originally Posted by queenaevadamthng View Post
    I had a very close family member who tried a few months ago. I am still not convinced that he won't try again. I feel like he is waiting for things to calm down. It seems like he is going through the motions and telling everyone what they want to hear so they won't worry. The last attempt was very planned out. He didn't make a big production or cry out for help, his wife just kinda knew. She knew where to find him and he was found in time. I'm very afraid that it's not over and next time he will plan so he will not be found.
    That's so sad! I truly, truly hope that your family member makes it through this low point in his life. Can his wife commit him to a mental hospital against his will? Or would he be the type to fake it for the doctors so they'll release him? I've unfortunately heard of that happening too often.

  3. #728
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    Quote Originally Posted by heliophobic37 View Post
    Thank you for the welcome and the kind words. I didn't blame myself, but I wish that our relationship had been different, like it would have saved him. But I've had more than one therapist and family members tell me that it would have just delayed the inevitable. It's a terrible way of looking at it, but maybe they're right? I don't know. I have my own past with mental illness and suicide attempts. While the suicide attempts are(hopefully)in the past, I'll be dealing with mental illness for the rest of my life. Since I have experience with feeling as low as you can get and the fact that I've always been an empath, I'm good at talking to friends that get suicidally low. I dated a guy who also has experience with feeling suicidal, but he's pro-suicide and would never give someone in need any hope or kind words. I can't wrap my brain around that kind of thinking. Thank goodness I don't speak to him anymore.
    I'm an Empath too. It's extremely difficult to filter the emotions. If you ever feel like you're heading in to that hole again, come here. We're just the right people to talk to as many of us also suffer from the same type of problems
    Quote Originally Posted by Nic B View Post
    That is too pretty to be shoved up an ass.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nic B View Post
    You can take those Fleets and shove them up your ass



  4. #729
    Senior Member queenaevadamthng's Avatar
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    Helio, he was in the hospital after the last episode. Now he is in outpatient care.


    "Theoretical physics can prove that an elephant can hang from a cliff with its tail tied to a daisy. But use your eyes, your common sense".... JIM GARRISON

  5. #730
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boston Babe 73 View Post
    I'm an Empath too. It's extremely difficult to filter the emotions. If you ever feel like you're heading in to that hole again, come here. We're just the right people to talk to as many of us also suffer from the same type of problems
    I agree! It's definitely difficult to filter the emotions. I get overwhelmed a lot and I have very few friends to vent to. The people where I live that I'm friends with can't relate to my feelings at all. Most people avoid me because I'm "too sad" or I "have a dark cloud over my head". I'm bipolar, amongst other things so occasional sadness comes with the territory. If I could just meet one person that truly gets me, understands me, doesn't judge and doesn't ditch me, I'd be happy. But I guess I can understand that I have the tendency to be too much for people to handle. I get them, why can't they get me?

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    Helio, unfortunately there are too many people that think we can all just snap out of it if we truly tried. You know get exercising and find something you really like to do. They don't get that it's a long term/ lifetime struggle and sometimes there are no good days for a bit. People seem to understand my anxiety/depression. But I too get overwhelmed by other people's emotions and that is something a lot of people can't get. Anyway, welcome to MDS.

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    Quote Originally Posted by dream View Post
    Helio, unfortunately there are too many people that think we can all just snap out of it if we truly tried. You know get exercising and find something you really like to do. They don't get that it's a long term/ lifetime struggle and sometimes there are no good days for a bit. People seem to understand my anxiety/depression. But I too get overwhelmed by other people's emotions and that is something a lot of people can't get. Anyway, welcome to MDS.
    Thank you dream! I've honestly struggled with mental illness since I was 7(I remember my first suicidal thoughts at that age very clearly). My mother and younger siblings are supportive, but my father doesn't believe in mental illness and has the mindset that you just need to pick yourself up by the bootstraps and do what needs to be done. He'll never understand the efforts I go through everyday, no matter how simply I try to explain things to him. He even convinced me when I was 16 that I didn't need to be on psych meds, so I stopped taking them and that ended BADLY. I often hear people say that psych meds are a crutch, which I think is b.s. Seriously, would you tell a diabetic that their insulin is a crutch? Mental illness is as real as physical illness and should be taken just as seriously.

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    A few days ago a 25 year old died "suddenly at his residence". I suspect it was a suicide due to people mentioning that he is now free of his inner demons and his Facebook page has a picture of him during a stint in the psych ward. It's really a shame. He was a skateboarder, animal lover and loved music. His family is asking for donations to be made to our local no-kill animal shelter in his name. R.I.P. Steven Ackerly

  9. #734
    What do you care? Boston Babe 73's Avatar
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    By NO means am I contemplating Suicide at the moment, so no worries. But I can't say that the thought hasn't crossed my mind. This thread was my first post and what brought me out of my lurking FFS(which I did for 5 years ).

    I do think about it from time to time, though. I even know how and where. Creepy, sure, but thinking and doing are SO far apart from each other in my mind that I can't ever seeing me ever doing it.

    Regardless, I've picked my song if I ever do. So if any of you EVER see me post this on FB, you know it's too late. And you're the one group of people I know that would truly understand that there was nothing you or anyone could have done.

    Again, it just happened to pop up on my shuffle on my iPod. I'm actually in a decent place at the moment. I just think it's beautiful in it's own way.

    Quote Originally Posted by Nic B View Post
    That is too pretty to be shoved up an ass.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nic B View Post
    You can take those Fleets and shove them up your ass



  10. #735
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    I need some advice. A long time friend of my husband's killed himself Tuesday night. We found out yesterday afternoon. My question is what do I do to support my husband? My instinct is to ask him how he's doing every 2 minutes which I know would not help and I am not doing that. Anyone that has been in his or my position, what helped the most?

  11. #736
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    Quote Originally Posted by dream View Post
    I need some advice. A long time friend of my husband's killed himself Tuesday night. We found out yesterday afternoon. My question is what do I do to support my husband? My instinct is to ask him how he's doing every 2 minutes which I know would not help and I am not doing that. Anyone that has been in his or my position, what helped the most?
    Same thing happened to my husband last spring. I tried to get him to talk about it and he wouldn't. I was still there for him in case he wanted to talk. It's sad how no one talks about suicide, even after it happens. Just be there for him. Hopefully you will have more luck than I did.

    "The love for all living creatures is the most noble attribute of man" -Charles Darwin

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  12. #737
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boston Babe 73 View Post
    By NO means am I contemplating Suicide at the moment, so no worries. But I can't say that the thought hasn't crossed my mind. This thread was my first post and what brought me out of my lurking FFS(which I did for 5 years ).

    I do think about it from time to time, though. I even know how and where. Creepy, sure, but thinking and doing are SO far apart from each other in my mind that I can't ever seeing me ever doing it.

    Regardless, I've picked my song if I ever do. So if any of you EVER see me post this on FB, you know it's too late. And you're the one group of people I know that would truly understand that there was nothing you or anyone could have done.

    Again, it just happened to pop up on my shuffle on my iPod. I'm actually in a decent place at the moment. I just think it's beautiful in it's own way.

    Wow ~ I haven't heard that song in what seems like forever. Boston ~ I am not FB friends with you, but I will kick your ass if you ever post it there.

  13. #738
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    Quote Originally Posted by dream View Post
    I need some advice. A long time friend of my husband's killed himself Tuesday night. We found out yesterday afternoon. My question is what do I do to support my husband? My instinct is to ask him how he's doing every 2 minutes which I know would not help and I am not doing that. Anyone that has been in his or my position, what helped the most?
    I agree with Angie. Just let him know you're there to talk to if he needs it. Otherwise there's not much you can do. I know that's painful and frustrating for you since you want to help. Just give him a hug and show him that you're there for support if he needs it
    Quote Originally Posted by Nic B View Post
    That is too pretty to be shoved up an ass.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nic B View Post
    You can take those Fleets and shove them up your ass



  14. #739
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    Thanks Angiebla and BB....I do think that he's going to deal with it like your husband did Angie...it worries me a bit but hopefully he will open up just a little when he's ready.

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    One of my favorite nurses from one of our local hospitals killed herself this week- She was always so happy, and I loved her. Ugh. RIP Denise.
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    I want that fucking meat.

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    Quote Originally Posted by PunkerDuckie View Post
    One of my favorite nurses from one of our local hospitals killed herself this week- She was always so happy, and I loved her. Ugh. RIP Denise.
    So sorry to hear that.

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    Quote Originally Posted by PunkerDuckie View Post
    One of my favorite nurses from one of our local hospitals killed herself this week- She was always so happy, and I loved her. Ugh. RIP Denise.
    How terrible.

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    Quote Originally Posted by PunkerDuckie View Post
    One of my favorite nurses from one of our local hospitals killed herself this week- She was always so happy, and I loved her. Ugh. RIP Denise.
    Sorry for the loss of your friend, Punker.
    As a retired nurse, I can tell you that working in the hospital setting has gotten much more stressful over the years. Of course, who knows what else she was dealing with in her life.
    May she rest in peace.

  19. #744
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    Quote Originally Posted by PunkerDuckie View Post
    One of my favorite nurses from one of our local hospitals killed herself this week- She was always so happy, and I loved her. Ugh. RIP Denise.
    i'm so sorry for your loss, punker.

  20. #745
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    Quote Originally Posted by PunkerDuckie View Post
    One of my favorite nurses from one of our local hospitals killed herself this week- She was always so happy, and I loved her. Ugh. RIP Denise.


    I'm so very sorry Punker
    Quote Originally Posted by Nic B View Post
    That is too pretty to be shoved up an ass.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nic B View Post
    You can take those Fleets and shove them up your ass



  21. #746
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    I just saw her last week and was giving her a gentle ribbing about sending us on a transfer. She was a traveler from Georgia I think. She had a thick accent and taught me the phrase "nuttier than squirrel shit" which was way better out of her mouth than mine. Ugh. I didn't think in a million years she'd kill herself.
    Quote Originally Posted by UncomfortablyNumb View Post
    I want that fucking meat.

  22. #747
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    Quote Originally Posted by PunkerDuckie View Post
    I just saw her last week and was giving her a gentle ribbing about sending us on a transfer. She was a traveler from Georgia I think. She had a thick accent and taught me the phrase "nuttier than squirrel shit" which was way better out of her mouth than mine. Ugh. I didn't think in a million years she'd kill herself.
    A lot of the time it's the people you'd never imagine who suffer in silence. Being a nurse is not an easy job, especially if you're empathetic or an actual empath. You absorb that energy and it's hard to see it every day.

    I hope she's at peace.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nic B View Post
    That is too pretty to be shoved up an ass.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nic B View Post
    You can take those Fleets and shove them up your ass



  23. #748
    Senior Member wondery's Avatar
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    Share your story as a person who has attempted suicide or experienced persistent suicidal ideation
    Deadline Feb 28, 2017 - just under 2 weeks away!

    Cash prizes up to $1,500


    Paul G. Quinnett Lived Experience Writing Contest
    Sponsored by the QPR Institute for the American Association of Suicidology

    http://www.suicidology.org/writing-contest

    From the website:

    The stories of those who have attempted suicide or experienced persistent suicidal ideation have, for too long, remained untold. Due to stigma and taboo, the world has been denied important educational narratives. The purpose of the Paul G. Quinnett Lived Experience Writing Contest is to encourage the publication of these stories of survival, hope, recovery, and revival.

    Cash prizes include:

    $1,500 for first place
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    Honorable mentions may also be given to outstanding stories of courage, and those winners will be given a certificate to commemorate the entry.

    Need help with the $10 entry fee? dm me here - seriously

    Please consider sharing if appropriate.

    Btw, is this the best spot for this post? Feel free to put somewhere else.
    Last edited by wondery; 02-15-2017 at 07:05 AM.

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    Junior Member Solitarypink's Avatar
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    I think some people just aren't meant to walk on this earth. Speaking from experience as a chronically suicidal person who has attempted survived many attempts and spent a lot of time in hospitals, people should have the right to choose to die. So many people say that suicide is selfish, but I think my family are the selfish ones for expecting me to suffer in chronic mental torment and misery- just so they won't have to deal with the sadness that comes with death. And in regards to people who have committed suicide who seemed so happy, I myself am a walking contradiction too. People always wonder how I can be laughing all the time and cracking jokes... It's because IDGAF anymore. I have to laugh because if I didn't, I would cry. As one doctor once said to me- Megan, the reason you're always so tired is because you've been treading water your entire life, you expend all your energy to keep your head above water and you can't pause to rest because if you did, you would drown in a sea of your own tears. Sorry for the long post, but I feel so passionately about this subject. We should all have the right to die with dignity. Please be considerate of the suffering of those loved ones you have lost, for one moment put aside your own pain and consider the suffering of others...

  25. #750
    What do you care? Boston Babe 73's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Solitarypink View Post
    I think some people just aren't meant to walk on this earth. Speaking from experience as a chronically suicidal person who has attempted survived many attempts and spent a lot of time in hospitals, people should have the right to choose to die. So many people say that suicide is selfish, but I think my family are the selfish ones for expecting me to suffer in chronic mental torment and misery- just so they won't have to deal with the sadness that comes with death. And in regards to people who have committed suicide who seemed so happy, I myself am a walking contradiction too. People always wonder how I can be laughing all the time and cracking jokes... It's because IDGAF anymore. I have to laugh because if I didn't, I would cry. As one doctor once said to me- Megan, the reason you're always so tired is because you've been treading water your entire life, you expend all your energy to keep your head above water and you can't pause to rest because if you did, you would drown in a sea of your own tears. Sorry for the long post, but I feel so passionately about this subject. We should all have the right to die with dignity. Please be considerate of the suffering of those loved ones you have lost, for one moment put aside your own pain and consider the suffering of others...
    I'm all for the right to die, but I also reserve that mainly for people who have very little to no options of treatment of any kind.

    Don't get me wrong, I'm well aware of the lack of availability of mental health treatment in the US, but is it that you just don't want to even try to get it? Or that you can't get it for some reason?

    I have a lot of loved ones that suffer from a variety of mental illness and it's a long and hurtful road finding the right "trick" to get it under control. But it's certainly possible to manage it in a way that stops a lot of the suffering.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nic B View Post
    That is too pretty to be shoved up an ass.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nic B View Post
    You can take those Fleets and shove them up your ass



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