Files detail harrowing events in Palm Bay mom case
They are the chilling words of a woman suspected of killing her own children.
In an at-times rambling three-page note left behind by Jessica McCarty, the 33-year-old woman who now faces a possible death penalty, wrote of troubled relationships, anger and feelings of worthlessness, along with her jealousy over what she says was her boyfriend's "infatuation" with another woman.
"I had no other choice," she writes in her note to boyfriend Christopher Swist.
She also places much of the blame for her feelings of insecurity on the boyfriend, telling him that she did her best to change her life, "only to be told how I suck at everything I do. Well you were right, I am worthless," she said, later telling detectives that her relationship had degraded over the last few weeks.
"Please remember all of the horrible and disrespectful things you said when you go for the jugular. Those words never leave me, I'm so sorry to put my family through this but I'm not worth living. I suck at life," McCarty wrote to Swist.
The note is part of court records detailing McCarty's March 20 arrest after she called 9-1-1 dispatchers to report that she killed her three children and that she had slit her wrists. McCarty is charged with first-degree murder in connection with the March 20 deaths of her three children, 5-month-old Christopher, 6-year-old Phillip and 7-year-old Lacey. A plea of not guilty was entered on her behalf in April.
The 9-1-1 calls and police body-camera video also reveal harrowing details in the case, from the shouts of officers for the bloodied woman to "drop the gun," to the frantic sounds of Swist holding his unresponsive son in his arms. She can also be seen on police video prone in the front yard of her Kenmore Street house, bleeding and dazed, after being hit with non-lethal beanbag rounds from a shotgun.
The files also lay the groundwork for McCarty's defense. Brevard-Seminole Public Defender Blaise Trettis, whose office is representing McCarty, had no comment on Thursday.
The released files contain information about two reported sexual assaults years earlier, including one when she was 7 years old, bouts of depression; treatment with anti-depressants and a C-section that left her with a blackened, gaping wound. She was also on food stamps and told friends she wanted to go out more but couldn't because of the children, records show.
"I just don't know what happened," McCarty said, crying as she spoke to detectives March 21.
"I don't have my kids anymore. I just can't. I don't know how I'm going to live with it," she said, according to transcripts released Thursday. The records also show that McCarty was at times lucid, asking how she could get an attorney from her hospital bed.
McCarty told investigators that earlier in the day March 20, daughter Lacey was watching cartoons as McCarty wrote her note. A short time later, Lacey was drowned while her two brothers were strangled, Palm Bay police reported. "She kept telling me, 'I love you mommy,' '' McCarty recalled Lacey saying. On the phone call to police, McCarty, a one-time nurse's assistant, asks for help.
Calling for help
"I need somebody here now, I need somebody here now. I just slit my wrist and probably won't be alive much longer," she told dispatchers, her voice calm but occasionally breaking with emotion.
Video taken by crime scene agents shows that blood splatter ? likely from her self-inflicted cuts ? was throughout the home which was also strewn with clothes. In the tub where police say Lacey was drowned, the water was still running, the video shows. In the room where two of the siblings were found, someone had left out copies of the children's birth certificates and Social Security cards.
Children's TV programs are seen still running on a living room screen.
On one 9-1-1 call, McCarty could be heard making the horrific declaration to police from her living room that, "my three kids are dead."
The records also detail how McCarty got into an argument the night before with Swist.
Swist told police that the argument was over a washing machine, which came from a woman that McCarty suspected of having a relationship with Swist. McCarty told detectives it revolved around Swist's threats to leave their relationship. Police talked with the other woman who denied doing anything more than send a few flirty text messages to Swist, reports show.
The state attorney's office has already filed notice that it plans to seek the death penalty in the case against McCarty pending any other evidence that would make them withdraw the decision. If the death penalty is pursued, the case could take decades to wind through the legal system.
Some of the records include interviews with family members along with Swist.
Swist told officers that McCarty dealt with mental health issues before they began their relationship and that she may have been on an unidentified anti-depressant. McCarty told detectives that the relationship grew increasingly violent and that one point, she was pushed against a wall. Police said there was no evidence to support such a claim.
Death on Kenmore
Hours before the slayings, McCarty took Swist to work.
The two traded texts throughout the day before McCarty called Swist and asked if he could babysit the three children while she went out to lunch. McCarty said that Swist instead asked her if he could have lunch at the home instead since he wasn't feeling well. A little later, McCarty's mother brought Phillip and Lacey home from Discovery Elementary.
Her seeming anger didn't stop at Swist, however. In her note, she also pointed the blame at her estranged husband, Phillip McCarty. "He never saw them anyway, so I understand it's horrible to lose a kid, but if you don't come around and you don't see your kids and you don't support your kids, it shouldn't have been hard on him as it was for everybody else," she told detectives, adding that McCarty should feel "guilty," for not seeing his children.
Phillip McCarty told FLORIDA TODAY that he had provided money to his wife for the children and frequently went to see them.
Another audio file included the frantic 9-1-1 call from Swist, the father of the 5-month-old, arriving at the residence on Kenmore Street within minutes after McCarty called him and told him to come home, authorities reported. Swist told police he initially thought McCarty was kidding when she told him that something had happened with the children. McCarty left the restaurant and called 9-1-1 after McCarty sent him a text with pictures of the bloodied home.
"My girlfriend killed all three of my kids," he said, telling the dispatcher that his child ? the 5-month-old ? was in his arms. He described seeing McCarty clutching a knife as he stood with his child, who was not breathing. "We don't need the whole dog and pony show," he said, his voice flushed with high emotion.
"Just get . . . over here," he shouted, as yelling could be heard in the background of the call.
On another call, the grandmother of the infant, screamed, "She killed my grandson . . . please send an ambulance!"
'Let me bleed'
Police arrived moments later and used a non-lethal bean bag to subdue McCarty in front of the couple's home, leaving bruises across her body. "Please let me bleed!" McCarty is heard saying as a Palm Bay officer is on top of her.
Officers rushed into the home and found the two other children, including Phillip McCarty with a cord wrapped around his neck. Lacey was pronounced dead a short time later. Phillip died later that night. Christopher, strangled with a phone charging cord, was on life support for two days before being declared dead.
No trial date has been set.