I wonder what the mother thinks often. I imagine she had grown angry over the years, thinking her son took off to follow the Dead and that he never cared to get back in touch with her. That many years thinking your child has chose to distant himself from you could cause a mother a lot of anger. Then to find out that your son didn't just not care, he was dead in an awful accident. Has to be devestating to the mother on many different levels. How could you explain 20 years of feeling and inaction? I would stay quiet too.