here's the first part of my story, I told the second part yesterday.
a year and a half ago we got a call from my parents neighbor in Florida. She thought something was wrong which confused my brother and I since my Father had repeatedly told us all was well. I flew from NY to Florida the next morning and had a person from my parent's community pick us up. My brother's then girlfriend came with me. My folks had no idea we were coming. I got there at noon and by 2 pm had both my parents in the hospital. Dad in ICU with advanced double pneumonia and mom on a regular floor with a very bad UTI. My dad went from bad to worse and four days later I signed the papers to take him off life support. He passed away that day but I was able to be with him and I promised him I would take care of Mom. The hardest part was telling her. Even now it makes me cry. I worked with a nursing home near me in NY and she flew out of Florida and was admitted to the home at midnight the day after Dad passed. I stayed in Florida and boxed up what I could fit in two vans and my brother and my best half drove down in our van and loaded up our's and Mom and Dad's and we took it all back to NY. My Mom went from me at the door, surprise!, to the hospital, to NY and never saw her husband, her friends, or her home again. And I gained a then 86 yr old child. We had a memorial service for Dad a year ago when Mom was able to at least go and now Dad resides on my china cabinet waiting for Mom. They were married 63 years. He took care of her for 63 years so how could I not take over. Funny thing, I'm not their favorite child. My brother is the family golden child but it's not about praise or who Mom loves best, it's about doing what's right and keeping a promise. Even funnier thing, I'm a better parent to Mom than she ever was to me :)