Childless or Childfree?

[neenerneener]

wtbb, i get where you're coming from. as long as your kids are respectful and good, well, thats what really matters. your kids are comfortable coming to you and talking about super personal things, they volunteer, they're kind hearted....you're doing something right. <3

also, i meant no personal computer. like, my kid isn't getting a laptop that they can take into their room and have access to whatever they want on the net. (yes, i know, there are parental controls) they can use a family computer, one that is out in the open, where i can pop by and see what they're doing. of course they'll have access to educational stuff, mostly offline. i don't want a net addicted kid. and they can have a cell phone. one of those little flip phones for contacting me or for emergencies. no way are they getting an iphone.

[TheFavoriteDaughter]

What the fuck does an 8 year old need the internet for. Or a cell phone. Who the fuck are they calling?!

With the way education is going, more and more things are web-based. Kids need access to it for school stuff.

BTW, I'm old-fashioned. You get nothing unless you earn it, no cell phones for anyone under the legal working age etc. I just know that having access to the (parent supervised) internet is more of a benefit than a detriment.

[andrea0121]

No kids, perfectly content with our dogs.

We actually just has 'the conversation' the other day about kids or no kids. We both came to the conclusion that we're both fine not having any. If for some reason either of us change our minds down the road, we're both open to discussion. I'm 33 and he's 34 and we've been together for almost 4 yrs so it was something that needed to be discussed (as Bowie pointed out, girls don't have the luxury of taking their time deciding). It's nice too because my parents are all NO WE'RE FINE WITH BEING GRANDPARENTS TO DOGS ITS COOL so we don't have pressure from them either.

[angelaiscaustic]

With the way education is going, more and more things are web-based. Kids need access to it for school stuff.

BTW, I'm old-fashioned. You get nothing unless you earn it, no cell phones for anyone under the legal working age etc. I just know that having access to the (parent supervised) internet is more of a benefit than a detriment.

meh. they can use the family computer to do that.

[Artemis]

meh. they can use the family computer to do that.

Good point.

[bowieluva]

Yeah, no personal computer. You can sit in the living room and look shit up.

[Monter]

Yeah, no personal computer. You can sit in the living room and look shit up.

Absolutely unequivocally this.
I am at the other extreme, seeing a lot of worst case scenarios- but no effing way do I want my kid on the internet unsupervised. It is absolutely insane what is possible for young teenagers to get on to and up to on there. And the social shit that goes on? Fuck that noise, he can sit in the living room, which will have supervision, and parental controls, to do whatever needs getting done.

[bowieluva]

Absolutely unequivocally this.
I am at the other extreme, seeing a lot of worst case scenarios- but no effing way do I want my kid on the internet unsupervised. It is absolutely insane what is possible for young teenagers to get on to and up to on there. And the social shit that goes on? Fuck that noise, he can sit in the living room, which will have supervision, and parental controls, to do whatever needs getting done.

When they're like 16, I won't care as much, but a 12 year old with that shit? I wanna make sure my kid's not a fucking retard before I just set them loose.

[Monter]

When they're like 16, I won't care as much, but a 12 year old with that shit? I wanna make sure my kid's not a fucking retard before I just set them loose.

Absolutely...
The amount of victimization and the DAMAGE that gets done- right under the noses of otherwise good, conscientious parents? No..
Like you said, until they are old enough to be let loose, Im ok with my kid growing up with my thumb in his eye when it comes to the internet.

[puzzld]

I convinced a friend that instead of a computer for her kids room, she should buy a huuuuge monitor for the "family" computer. She has thanked me several times. She could glance up from whatever she is doing and see exactly what is going on and the kids were just thrilled to have the big screen for their games.

[debk589]

I convinced a friend that instead of a computer for her kids room, she should buy a huuuuge monitor for the "family" computer. She has thanked me several times. She could glance up from whatever she is doing and see exactly what is going on and the kids were just thrilled to have the big screen for their games.

Smart!! I'm so going this route.

[Seraphim]

wtbb, i get where you're coming from. as long as your kids are respectful and good, well, thats what really matters. your kids are comfortable coming to you and talking about super personal things, they volunteer, they're kind hearted....you're doing something right. <3

also, i meant no personal computer. like, my kid isn't getting a laptop that they can take into their room and have access to whatever they want on the net. (yes, i know, there are parental controls) they can use a family computer, one that is out in the open, where i can pop by and see what they're doing. of course they'll have access to educational stuff, mostly offline. i don't want a net addicted kid. and they can have a cell phone. one of those little flip phones for contacting me or for emergencies. no way are they getting an iphone.

Every damn time I see my nephew, he begs me to buy him a white iphone. Fuck. That. Shit. This shit heads like 13!! In the last year, his grandfather has bought him 3 pay as you go phones. 3 fucking phones! Uh, how about no? I told him to tell his father to buy him one..."Dad says no!!" Well, dads right. My brother, bless his damned ignorant soul, decided that, since we had rules and shit growing up and he hated them, his kids were gonna run freeeeeeeeeee.... and now? Now, they're assholes. I love them to death, but what the fuck did he expect?? One kid got her hands on a bottle of whiskey and gave it to her friends. At school. Didn't see why people were all up in arms - *she* didn't drink, wasn't a big deal, right? :facepalm:

Around the time my brothers first one was born, I was (I think) 14. While my brother and the egg supplier (she's an asshole..thats another story though) were working, I had that kid. Some days, I had her from 6am (In the summer) until I went to bed. It sucked so much ass, but I think that's why I was so against having kids and shit for the longestttt time. She was my birth control. Hell, the day the second one was born, I was at home baby sitting the first one.

Not that it matters, I'll probably never end up seeing a pregnancy to the end.. blergh. /end pity party

Ugh, in about a week, I have to go to a baby shower for my 17 year old cousin. I have to give this shit head, that I haven't even seen for like a year, a gift for a baby that was a complete fucking accident, and I have to act happy about this shit? Congratulations for becoming a statistic! I have never given birth to a kid of my own ( have a step-kid) so I know how its going to go. When are you and mister going to have one of your own? Its gonna fuckin' suck. "Well, we're up to six miscarriages..." doesn't really seem like an appropriate answer... plus, my mother will be in town and I'm sure I'll get bitch slapped if I use that answer anyway..lol!

[puzzld]

FWIW I don't see any reason not to use the six miscarriages answer. The question is rude, the answer might as well be too.

It really sucks to see people who want kids and can't have them while children who shouldn't be allowed out of the house alone are reproducing...

[angelaiscaustic]

FWIW I don't see any reason not to use the six miscarriages answer. The question is rude, the answer might as well be too.

It really sucks to see people who want kids and can't have them while children who shouldn't be allowed out of the house alone are reproducing...

Yes to both of these.

[debk589]

FWIW I don't see any reason not to use the six miscarriages answer. The question is rude, the answer might as well be too.

It really sucks to see people who want kids and can't have them while children who shouldn't be allowed out of the house alone are reproducing...

Exactly. My BFF just started her third round of IVF (fingers crossed!) and she would tear up whenever anyone asked her "when are you gonna have kids"?? so rude. it seems like a harmless question, but you never know someone's situation. She finally got to the point where she would just say "we're trying" and that would usually shut people up. But I swear, I would wanna be like "NONE OF YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS" whenever I overheard someone ask her.

Not to mention me getting pregnant and having to break the news to my best friend in the entire world that I was preggs after she had her second miscarriage. Augh. Terrible. I felt sick over it.

[sarabei]

Me and Philip decided being cat parents was the road for us. Had we met younger...maybe....but when we met we both realized we were having to much fun being care free and too selfish to have a children. We both felt that if we were going to be parents to a child it had to come first, as it should be and we weren't prepared to do that. I get the occasional ovary twinge but that is passing, especially when I see kids having meltdowns. But I think it is a personal choice to either have them or not and don't judge either way.

[Cap-n Meow]

We had our family computer in a closed off room in our house. I looked at SOOOOOO much porn...on dial up. So it was like 10% of what kids are capable or looking up nowadays. No way in hell is my son getting a computer in his room.

I like having a son and he's still alive so I think I'm doing a swell job.

[White trash bitchy blonde]

I will say that my children have more than what I had when I was their age and even tho I may indulge them a bit, I really push responsibility on them.

They are pretty good kids and even bodhi has his days where he can be a mouthy shit but one thing I love about especially Bodhi is that we will get into an argument that ends with me telling him that he better walk away because Im so mad and like 10 minutes later he will come in and say to me that he is sorry and tell me why he is upset and ill do the same. We hug it out and are better afterwards.

[emmieslost]

i want children. i've had such a hard time with my endometriosis and in a relationship where i was treated like crap for years and years i've tried SO HARD to NOT want to have kids, and i just can't turn it off. we don't work that way. ended up at a therapists to get over the damage i've done to myself and allowed to happen. this shit makes me all emo and hormonal and FUCK i wish it didn't.

[Fleta]

Frog in your pocket?

[Deviant Toaster]

From a very early age I never wanted children or to be married for that matter. Every now and then I think "oh that would be nice" then I realize it's because I get to take them home. haha I love being an aunt and love children, but as far as having my own there is just not the want or feeling that I need to have children.

[PunkerDuckie]

Some girl I went to Jr High with taught me and a bunch of other girls how to "cyber" in a chat room in her room during a sleepover when we were like 13. My kids are not getting unsupervised internet. Eff that shit. Looking back now, we were prolly chatting with a 40 year old bald dude in his underwear. *shudders*

My 16 y/o nephew got busted looking at internet porn last week. My mom thinks he's a sexual deviant. My bf told her if him and my brothers would have had access to internet porn at that age, they would have been doing it too. I don't think she realizes that boys like to look at nakedness, any way possible, once they realize they have a penis.

[Cap-n Meow]

Some girl I went to Jr High with taught me and a bunch of other girls how to "cyber" in a chat room in her room during a sleepover when we were like 13. My kids are not getting unsupervised internet. Eff that shit. Looking back now, we were prolly chatting with a 40 year old bald dude in his underwear. *shudders*

My 16 y/o nephew got busted looking at internet porn last week. My mom thinks he's a sexual deviant. My bf told her if him and my brothers would have had access to internet porn at that age, they would have been doing it too. I don't think she realizes that boys like to look at nakedness, any way possible, once they realize they have a penis.

When I was in kindergarten I had found my dads playboys in our basement one day. I cut out the pictures and took them to school to share with my friends.

[once_again]

One night my cousin came to hangout with her kids. Her son, who is about 13, asked to borrow my iPad so that he can look at music videos on YouTube. I was horrified the next morning when I started opening my pages and saw all these Google image searches for "Boobs Sex", "Naked Boobs" and "Sex Naked". I didn't tell her because I figured he was a teenage boy who is hitting puberty and he's probably just curious or has some raging hormones, but it grossed me out. He was sitting on my couch, in the living room, while we're outside, less than 10 feet away from him, while he's getting off on my computer and he's obviously a boob man.

[sue_vicious]

I'm almost 30, and my biological clock has never ticked. I have no interest in children. However, my husband at least claims to want them, which makes me feel pretty terrible.