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Thread: Craig's List Assbags.

  1. #26
    Senior Member brie's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    I love the drug free disease free and vasectomy part.
    HAHAHA
    Quote Originally Posted by marakisses
    yes i said i will leave it under you storage he said cuddle with me i said shut up it over??? what am i doing wrong??

  2. #27
    roflcopter pilot Mr. Formaldehyde's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    [quote author=brie star link=topic=5585.msg229756#msg229756 date=1173775546]
    I love the drug free disease free and vasectomy part.
    HAHAHA
    [/quote]

    he doesn't give his age though  :|
    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Formaldehyde
    errrr...you got a towel?
    Quote Originally Posted by Natasha_XO
    no, I got a face though.

  3. #28
    Senior Member brie's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    what all info can you find on a 53 year old male with the email address of txwolffifty@yahoo.com
    Quote Originally Posted by marakisses
    yes i said i will leave it under you storage he said cuddle with me i said shut up it over??? what am i doing wrong??

  4. #29
    Senior Member brie's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    [quote author=Mr. Formaldehyde link=topic=5585.msg229757#msg229757 date=1173775625]
    he doesn't give his age though  :|
    [/quote]

    OLD.
    Quote Originally Posted by marakisses
    yes i said i will leave it under you storage he said cuddle with me i said shut up it over??? what am i doing wrong??

  5. #30
    Senior Member brie's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    by the way, these are all the guys that message me on myspace constantly.
    freakin old men.
    Quote Originally Posted by marakisses
    yes i said i will leave it under you storage he said cuddle with me i said shut up it over??? what am i doing wrong??

  6. #31
    Rational Republican Chauncy's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    Brie this is the perfect guy for you.


    Christian man seeking missing rib - 37


    I am a Christian man in Chicago seeking a Christian woman who loves the Lord. I have never been married and I have no children (still a virgin). I have a masters degree and I work in ministry. I do not drink or smoke.

    Write me if you would like to know more. You can see my profile at meetchristians.com. It is a free site with chat and discussion forums. They will ask for donations, but donations are voluntary.

    My profile is lakewalker36885

    Blessings.

    Because of spammers, I will not reply to an email unless you answer the following question correctly. In what book and chapter of the Bible does it speak about a Godly wife?





    Take his cherry hun!!!!!!
    And affirmative action is a very nice term for racial discrimination against better-qualified white people in jobs, employment, promotions and scholarships, and college admittance.

  7. #32
    roflcopter pilot Mr. Formaldehyde's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    [quote author=brie star link=topic=5585.msg229759#msg229759 date=1173775695]
    OLD.
    [/quote]

    aww, c'mon you don't think he's 20 or something?

    [quote author=brie star link=topic=5585.msg229760#msg229760 date=1173775740]
    by the way, these are all the guys that message me on myspace constantly.
    freakin old men.
    [/quote]

    me too, what the hell?  :roll:
    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Formaldehyde
    errrr...you got a towel?
    Quote Originally Posted by Natasha_XO
    no, I got a face though.

  8. #33
    Rational Republican Chauncy's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    [quote author=brie star link=topic=5585.msg229758#msg229758 date=1173775678]
    what all info can you find on a 53 year old male with the email address of txwolffifty@yahoo.com
    [/quote]


    http://360.yahoo.com/lists-WPaEuoUmdKpE_4YJar7pu9WU
    And affirmative action is a very nice term for racial discrimination against better-qualified white people in jobs, employment, promotions and scholarships, and college admittance.

  9. #34
    Senior Member Deviant Toaster's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    [quote author=Wick link=topic=5585.msg229761#msg229761 date=1173775823]
    Brie this is the perfect guy for you.


    Christian man seeking missing rib - 37


    I am a Christian man in Chicago seeking a Christian woman who loves the Lord. I have never been married and I have no children (still a virgin). I have a masters degree and I work in ministry. I do not drink or smoke.

    Write me if you would like to know more. You can see my profile at meetchristians.com. It is a free site with chat and discussion forums. They will ask for donations, but donations are voluntary.

    My profile is lakewalker36885

    Blessings.

    Because of spammers, I will not reply to an email unless you answer the following question correctly. In what book and chapter of the Bible does it speak about a Godly wife?





    Take his cherry hun!!!!!!
    [/quote]

    Sweet Jesus!

  10. #35
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    [quote author=Wick link=topic=5585.msg229761#msg229761 date=1173775823]
    Brie this is the perfect guy for you.


    Christian man seeking missing rib - 37


    I am a Christian man in Chicago seeking a Christian woman who loves the Lord. I have never been married and I have no children (still a virgin). I have a masters degree and I work in ministry. I do not drink or smoke.

    Write me if you would like to know more. You can see my profile at meetchristians.com. It is a free site with chat and discussion forums. They will ask for donations, but donations are voluntary.

    My profile is lakewalker36885

    Blessings.

    Because of spammers, I will not reply to an email unless you answer the following question correctly. In what book and chapter of the Bible does it speak about a Godly wife?





    Take his cherry hun!!!!!!
    [/quote]


    :lol: :lol:

    I think that fact that you hang out on MDS automatically disqualifies you from this dood!

  11. #36
    Senior Member brie's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    [quote author=Wick link=topic=5585.msg229761#msg229761 date=1173775823]
    Brie this is the perfect guy for you.


    Christian man seeking missing rib - 37


    I am a Christian man in Chicago seeking a Christian woman who loves the Lord. I have never been married and I have no children (still a virgin). I have a masters degree and I work in ministry. I do not drink or smoke.

    Write me if you would like to know more. You can see my profile at meetchristians.com. It is a free site with chat and discussion forums. They will ask for donations, but donations are voluntary.

    My profile is lakewalker36885

    Blessings.

    Because of spammers, I will not reply to an email unless you answer the following question correctly. In what book and chapter of the Bible does it speak about a Godly wife?





    Take his cherry hun!!!!!!
    [/quote]


    The answer is 1 Peter.
    What do I win?
    Quote Originally Posted by marakisses
    yes i said i will leave it under you storage he said cuddle with me i said shut up it over??? what am i doing wrong??

  12. #37
    roflcopter pilot Mr. Formaldehyde's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    [quote author=Deviant Toaster link=topic=5585.msg229764#msg229764 date=1173776126]
    Sweet Jesus!
    [/quote]

    yo, what's up? 
    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Formaldehyde
    errrr...you got a towel?
    Quote Originally Posted by Natasha_XO
    no, I got a face though.

  13. #38
    roflcopter pilot Mr. Formaldehyde's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    [quote author=brie star link=topic=5585.msg229767#msg229767 date=1173776260]

    The answer is 1 Peter.
    What do I win?
    [/quote]

    he just wanted an answer of "peter" didn't he? perv!
    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Formaldehyde
    errrr...you got a towel?
    Quote Originally Posted by Natasha_XO
    no, I got a face though.

  14. #39
    Senior Member Deviant Toaster's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    [quote author=Mr. Formaldehyde link=topic=5585.msg229768#msg229768 date=1173776286]
    yo, what's up? 
    [/quote]

    I am completely baffled by craigslist. It is like the uncovering of the innerbreading heartland. I must thank you for opening my eyes to such comedy.

  15. #40
    BelleMorte
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    I had no idea this kind of funny stuff was posted on Craig's List. I only went there once in search of a cheap desk. I should go there more often for a good laugh. I got an insane one on SinglesNet the other day.

  16. #41
    Senior Member Deviant Toaster's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    [quote author=brie star link=topic=5585.msg229767#msg229767 date=1173776260]

    The answer is 1 Peter.
    What do I win?
    [/quote]

    Well heck he'll answer your email and probably propose marriage on the spot. LOL
    I wonder if he is related to the Duggar family, lol.

  17. #42
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    [quote author=Wick link=topic=5585.msg229761#msg229761 date=1173775823]
    Brie this is the perfect guy for you.
    [size=8pt]

    Christian man seeking missing rib
    [/size] - 37


    I am a Christian man in Chicago seeking a Christian woman who loves the Lord. I have never been married and I have no children (still a virgin). I have a masters degree and I work in ministry. I do not drink or smoke.

    Write me if you would like to know more. You can see my profile at meetchristians.com. It is a free site with chat and discussion forums. They will ask for donations, but donations are voluntary.

    My profile is lakewalker36885

    Blessings.

    Because of spammers, I will not reply to an email unless you answer the following question correctly. In what book and chapter of the Bible does it speak about a Godly wife?





    Take his cherry hun!!!!!!
    [/quote]

    I want to be his rib! 






    :roll:

  18. #43
    roflcopter pilot Mr. Formaldehyde's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    [quote author=Deviant Toaster link=topic=5585.msg229772#msg229772 date=1173776443]
    I am completely baffled by craigslist. It is like the uncovering of the innerbreading heartland. I must thank you for opening my eyes to such comedy.
    [/quote]

    CL is always good for a few laughs.  
    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Formaldehyde
    errrr...you got a towel?
    Quote Originally Posted by Natasha_XO
    no, I got a face though.

  19. #44
    Senior Member brie's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    Is this YOU MR. F??



    This is going to be very specific. I'll be surprised if anyone even reads this whole thing, and even more surprised if I dont get flagged for being a total DICK. Heh.





    YOU....





    ....want a lot of sex.





    ....know that flirting does not have to include talking about sex.





    ....are interested in a connection thats more than just sex, less than dating exclusively.





    ....know the difference between you're and your.





    ....do not use !!!! after every fucking sentence!





    ....are A LITTLE shy.





    ....are not so confidant that you only are interested in yourself.





    ....are not only interested in what I think of the way you look.





    ....are not waiting for me to shut up so you can talk more about yoruself.





    ....are interested in a long term sexual/casual dating situation.





    ....are not going to call me, and then when I dont answer, keep calling until you find out where i'm at...unless its because youre really horny and all you want is me.





    ....are not going to call me, and then when I dont answer, keep calling until you find out where i've been, only to then ream me because you didnt know where I was...because you're a crazy person who needs a life.





    ....know that you can have feelings for a person yet still have casual sex with them. I may like you more than just a friend, but it will be, and will always remain, casual sex and dating. And yes there will probably be more than one person I am screwing/dating at a time. I expect you to do the same unless youre fine with just doing this with me but arent going to try and "tame me". Because i'll tell you right now..i'm definitely not going to take kindly to that. I do what I want when I want, but I will always make time for your wants and needs, no doubt.





    ....have no problem with making out/face fucking/ass grabbing/crotch rubbing in public places if the mood strikes either of us.





    ....are not someone who only wants to stay at home and watch movies. I'm fine with that on occasion, or to set a mood before we have sex. But I do not like to sit at home as a rule. I wanna be go go go go going all the time. I have money, I have time, and I need to be entertained. (I'm energetic but not bouncing off the walls.)





    ....spend time online late at night and love to bullshit about anything from physics to animal dung.





    ....would wake me up at 2am and tell me to get some clothes on so we can go tear some shit up somewhere..





    Embrace my stubborn nature and revel in it, or go byebye please. I'm so much fun and i'm so easy to get along with...but I dont like whiners or bitchers. I will take you for exactly who you are, or I will walk. I will never bitch at you or try and change you..i'll just walk. And I expect you to do the same.





    ....think its cute that i'm somewhat fiesty without being a total cast iron dick. I have such a soft sweet side to me and sometimes i'll get mushy and lovey dovey. Embrace that or..well you know the drill. LOL





    ....will let me tell you I really really like you and think youre beautiful and amazing and take it for what it is..meaning that just because I think these things about you, it changes NOTHING. It simply means I appreciate who you are and enjoy your company.





    ....are okay with me being old fashioned. I like the female to let me take charge and make the first move. Taking charge does NOT equal buying all my food, paying my way every single time, pulling out your chair. I do like it when someone asks to hold their purse while they put my coat on. Will open doors for me but lets me open doors too. Will let me open your car door but not close it.





    ....will let me sleep over on the weekend.





    ....are okay with my crazy hair color that I change every week, tattoos, piercing, and vulgar displays of affection.





    ....are between 24-33.





    ....live alone, or have roommates that dont mind a cute weird loud-during-sex guy sleeping over.





    ....must, over time, be able to trust me. Thats important to me. I want to be able to say something to you, and have you know that i'm telling you how it is, not telling you something I WANT to be true.





    ....do not automatically assume since i'm a man that I am manipulative, sneaky, about entrapment, or that I play games. I do not have time for that fucking bullshit and frankly if YOU have the time and patience to put up with a man who IS like that, I dont want you.





    ....have read this whole thing and processed it and will only respond after youve read the whole thing and know that you are all the things I want. I swear to god I will know exactly which parts youve skipped over by the questions you ask me. LOL I am a professional poster here at CL...my skills of reading people, reading between the lines, and my bullshti detector are FINELY honed. You arent getting a damn thing past me unless I let you.





    This sounds so demanding and just awful at times, but seriously..I just dont want anyone to waste their time, I promise. I'm very open and honest and blunt and dont try and misrepresent myself. I believe everyone should know what theyre getting into with me. I have pics, and i'm not a beast. I'm actually horribly cute most of the time. Cute does NOT mean like a puppy. I am definitely not that, but I am highly manly.
    Quote Originally Posted by marakisses
    yes i said i will leave it under you storage he said cuddle with me i said shut up it over??? what am i doing wrong??

  20. #45
    Senior Member brie's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    Are you that little innocent girl that turns into a lion in bed - 30
    If you feel like hanging out and see where it goes from there let me know.
    I'm up for anything


    http://austin.craigslist.org/m4w/292674074.html
    Quote Originally Posted by marakisses
    yes i said i will leave it under you storage he said cuddle with me i said shut up it over??? what am i doing wrong??

  21. #46
    Administrator Olivia's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    [quote author=snipsnip link=topic=5585.msg229775#msg229775 date=1173776576]
    I want to be his rib! 

    :roll:
    [/quote]

    When I first read the missing a rib bit, I assumed he had a rib removed so he could suck himself off ala Marilyn Manson rumours.  I need to get out of the gutter.

  22. #47
    roflcopter pilot Mr. Formaldehyde's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    [quote author=brie star link=topic=5585.msg229777#msg229777 date=1173776668]
    Is this YOU MR. F??



    This is going to be very specific. I'll be surprised if anyone even reads this whole thing, and even more surprised if I dont get flagged for being a total DICK. Heh.





    YOU....





    ....want a lot of sex.





    ....know that flirting does not have to include talking about sex.





    ....are interested in a connection thats more than just sex, less than dating exclusively.





    ....know the difference between you're and your.





    ....do not use !!!! after every fucking sentence!





    ....are A LITTLE shy.





    ....are not so confidant that you only are interested in yourself.





    ....are not only interested in what I think of the way you look.





    ....are not waiting for me to shut up so you can talk more about yoruself.





    ....are interested in a long term sexual/casual dating situation.





    ....are not going to call me, and then when I dont answer, keep calling until you find out where i'm at...unless its because youre really horny and all you want is me.





    ....are not going to call me, and then when I dont answer, keep calling until you find out where i've been, only to then ream me because you didnt know where I was...because you're a crazy person who needs a life.





    ....know that you can have feelings for a person yet still have casual sex with them. I may like you more than just a friend, but it will be, and will always remain, casual sex and dating. And yes there will probably be more than one person I am screwing/dating at a time. I expect you to do the same unless youre fine with just doing this with me but arent going to try and "tame me". Because i'll tell you right now..i'm definitely not going to take kindly to that. I do what I want when I want, but I will always make time for your wants and needs, no doubt.




    ....have no problem with making out/face fucking/ass grabbing/crotch rubbing in public places if the mood strikes either of us.





    ....are not someone who only wants to stay at home and watch movies. I'm fine with that on occasion, or to set a mood before we have sex. But I do not like to sit at home as a rule. I wanna be go go go go going all the time. I have money, I have time, and I need to be entertained. (I'm energetic but not bouncing off the walls.)





    ....spend time online late at night and love to bullshit about anything from physics to animal dung.





    ....would wake me up at 2am and tell me to get some clothes on so we can go tear some shit up somewhere..





    Embrace my stubborn nature and revel in it, or go byebye please. I'm so much fun and i'm so easy to get along with...but I dont like whiners or bitchers. I will take you for exactly who you are, or I will walk. I will never bitch at you or try and change you..i'll just walk. And I expect you to do the same.





    ....think its cute that i'm somewhat fiesty without being a total cast iron dick. I have such a soft sweet side to me and sometimes i'll get mushy and lovey dovey. Embrace that or..well you know the drill. LOL





    ....will let me tell you I really really like you and think youre beautiful and amazing and take it for what it is..meaning that just because I think these things about you, it changes NOTHING. It simply means I appreciate who you are and enjoy your company.





    ....are okay with me being old fashioned. I like the female to let me take charge and make the first move. Taking charge does NOT equal buying all my food, paying my way every single time, pulling out your chair. I do like it when someone asks to hold their purse while they put my coat on. Will open doors for me but lets me open doors too. Will let me open your car door but not close it.





    ....will let me sleep over on the weekend.





    ....are okay with my crazy hair color that I change every week, tattoos, piercing, and vulgar displays of affection.





    ....are between 24-33.





    ....live alone, or have roommates that dont mind a cute weird loud-during-sex guy sleeping over.




    ....must, over time, be able to trust me. Thats important to me. I want to be able to say something to you, and have you know that i'm telling you how it is, not telling you something I WANT to be true.





    ....do not automatically assume since i'm a man that I am manipulative, sneaky, about entrapment, or that I play games. I do not have time for that fucking bullshit and frankly if YOU have the time and patience to put up with a man who IS like that, I dont want you.





    ....have read this whole thing and processed it and will only respond after youve read the whole thing and know that you are all the things I want. I swear to god I will know exactly which parts youve skipped over by the questions you ask me. LOL I am a professional poster here at CL...my skills of reading people, reading between the lines, and my bullshti detector are FINELY honed. You arent getting a damn thing past me unless I let you.





    This sounds so demanding and just awful at times, but seriously..I just dont want anyone to waste their time, I promise. I'm very open and honest and blunt and dont try and misrepresent myself. I believe everyone should know what theyre getting into with me. I have pics, and i'm not a beast. I'm actually horribly cute most of the time. Cute does NOT mean like a puppy. I am definitely not that, but I am highly manly.

    [/quote]


    OMG, I didn't realize how much detail I went into...er, I mean he went into... :roll:

    I love the bolded parts.
    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Formaldehyde
    errrr...you got a towel?
    Quote Originally Posted by Natasha_XO
    no, I got a face though.

  23. #48
    Senior Member brie's Avatar
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    LOL
    this one made me laugh
    HES LOOKIN FOR A GINGER KID!

    Hi, I'm looking for a naturally redheaded female for a LTR. I love to have fun and want to find a healthy, great looking, friendly, loveable naturally redheaded female for companionship and romance. I have never been married and have no kids. If you fit the description and want kids I will be more than happy to help create them with you. I'm a healthy, monogomous, and loyal male. I do need the same kind of female to be with. Please send your photo if you feel you have what I'm looking for. Thank you for your time. I'm waiting to hear from you. Yes, RED is my favorite color. Ha Ha! LOL. XOXOXO. I'm really open to all females who are really sexy and hot!!! XOXO

    P.S. IF YOU LIKE WHAT YOU SEE? SEND YOUR PICTURE WITH RESPONSE.



    http://austin.craigslist.org/m4w/292457833.html
    Quote Originally Posted by marakisses
    yes i said i will leave it under you storage he said cuddle with me i said shut up it over??? what am i doing wrong??

  24. #49
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    I got here and stoped:

    ....have no problem with making out/face fucking/ass grabbing/crotch rubbing in public places if the mood strikes either of us.

    Skull fucking in public?  I thought that was only what someone would do in private?

  25. #50
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    Re: Craig's List Assbags.

    [quote author=Olivia link=topic=5585.msg229780#msg229780 date=1173776901]
    When I first read the missing a rib bit, I assumed he had a rib removed so he could suck himself off ala Marilyn Manson rumours.  I need to get out of the gutter.
    [/quote]
    :lol:

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