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Thread: Rachel Ehmke (13) committed suicide by hanging after being bullied

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    Senior Member rachy's Avatar
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    Rachel Ehmke (13) committed suicide by hanging after being bullied

    http://mydeathspace.com/article/2012..._being_bullied

    Rachel Ehmke, 13-Year-Old Minnesota Student, Commits Suicide After Months Of Bullying



    Rachel Ehmke, a 13-year-old seventh grader in Mantorville, Minn., died April 29 after hanging herself at her home. The months leading up to the tragedy were a whirlwind of peer abuse instances, her parents say.

    Now following Rachel's Friday funeral that was met with widespread community condolences, Rick and Mary Ehmke are speaking out against the bullying they say their daughter endured at Kasson/Mantorville Middle School and online.

    Rachel's family and friends say the teen fell victim to school bullying last fall when her chewing gum was stuck to her textbooks and the word "slut" was scrawled across her gym locker, the Austin Daily Herald reports. And while she was outgoing, athletic and friendly, the same group of girls reportedly threatened Rachel and kept calling her a "prostitute," though she had never kissed a boy, according to KMSP.

    Two days before Rachel's death, an anonymous text was sent to other students at the school, KARE reports.

    "It was pretty explicit. Something to the effect of that Rachel was a slut and to get her to leave the Kasson-Mantorville School, forward this to everyone you know," parent Chris Flannery told the station.

    But after the text was reported to authorities, it was traced to someone who wasn't a student at the school, according to Minnesota Public Radio. The district's bullying policy prohibits threats both in person and online, and promises investigations within 24 hours of any reported bullying.

    Rachel reportedly pleaded with her father not to mention the bullying to school officials, for fear of worsening the situation. A note that her parents found after her death read, "I'm fine = I wish I could tell you how I really feel," alongside a picture of a broken heart, according to KMSP.

    Dodge County authorities plan to meet this week to discuss possible criminal charges, the Star Tribune reports. But Rick Ehmke says the family doesn't plan to press charges against those who bullied his daughter.

    "They're kids. They made some horrible decisions. If these kids would've known this would happen I'm pretty sure they never, ever would have done what they did," Rick Ehmke told Minnesota Public Radio. "Sadly enough, even those kids that know who they are will carry this bag their whole life. That's a sad thing too, it really is."

    He also notes that the school should have taken heavier measures against the bullies when the taunting was first reported in the fall, adding that technology like phones and social media may have worsened an already bad situation by allowing the bully to essentially follow students home.

    "Words hurt. Word can kill," mother Mary Ehmke told KARE.

    Community members have planned a prayer vigil and walk in Rachel's memory for 2 p.m. May 19 at Mill Pond in Austin, Minn. The walk aims to show support for the Ehmke family and raise awareness for teen suicide and bullying.

    The U.S. Department of Education has identified 16 "key components" in state bullying legislation, including a statement of scope, listing of enumerated groups, process of district policy review, definitions and reporting guidelines. Minnesota ranks last in the country with its state bullying law only covering two of the 16 components, according to an Education Department analysis of state bullying laws released in December. Nebraska ranks second-to-last by covering four of the 16 components.

    Statement of scope, one of the most common components of state bullying laws, establishes where legislation applies and what conditions must exist for schools to have authority over student conduct.

    According to the Education Department report, Minnesota is one of just three states -- alongside Wisconsin and Arizona -- that prohibits bullying but doesn't define that behavior. The state also doesn't provide for its districts a model bullying policy, and at a mere 37 words, its anti-bullying law is the shortest one in the country:
    Each school board shall adopt a written policy prohibiting intimidation and bullying of any student. The policy shall address intimidation and bullying in all forms, including, but not limited to, electronic forms and forms involving Internet use.

    Need help? In the U.S., call 1-800-273-8255 for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/0...n_1501143.html
    Last edited by Olivia; 05-09-2012 at 01:52 PM.

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    Senior Member rachy's Avatar
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    No charges in Rachel Ehmke death

    KASSON-MANTORVILLE, Minn. (FOX 47) -- More details have been released in the death investigation surrounding 7th grader Rachel Ehmke.

    According to a news release sent by Dodge County Sheriff, Jim Jensen, investigators have been working on finding the source of a text message forwarded to several students' cell phones on April 26. The text referred to Rachel as a "slut" and suggested sending it around to get Rachel out of the school.

    Jensen's release states, "Through our investigation, which is still open pending autopsy results, we've determined that the text message in question originated from Rachel's father's residence, and possibly Rachel herself. Due to there being no suicide note left, we can only speculate as to her motivation for sending this message out. We did receive information that she had been talking to friends about trying to transfer out of KM because of problems she had been having there and had mentioned this to her parents on Friday (April 27)."

    On April 28, Rachel killed herself.

    Rachel's family says she had been dealing with on-going bullying at Kasson-Mantorville Middle School for several months and had mentioned wanting to change schools.

    According to the news release, investigators believe harassment and bullying were likely factors in Rachel's death. The news release states, "It appears that she had problems with a number of different people, of different ages, over the past several months. Unfortunately, there was a rush to judgment by many as to who was responsible for this most recent incident. Many of these students who have been singled out, harassed and bullied since her death were in fact students who Rachel told Officer Peck that she was now friends with again. There is not one incident or action done by any particular student(s) that we believe is responsible for Rachel's death."

    Investigators say several students, including four who originally reported the text message to Principal Al Hodge, were blamed for the message and had become the targets of bullying and harassment during the week after Rachel's death.

    The Kasson Police Department and K-M School District will now review bullying and harassment complaints filed, and consequences for students who participate in this behavior.

    http://www.myfox47.com/story/1824221...-investigation

  3. #3
    Chin Checker g r ee n ey e s's Avatar
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    Sooo.. they are saying that she sent a fucked up message about herself to everyone at her school?? Somehow I don't believe that.


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    Moderator bowieluva's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by g r ee n ey e s View Post
    Sooo.. they are saying that she sent a fucked up message about herself to everyone at her school?? Somehow I don't believe that.
    Unless the implication is that either Rachel's death was not a suicide and her father was being super clever by using bullying as a defense, or they're saying Rachel was mentally ill, which, sometimes, you know, people have problems with other people and are socially ill-adjusted because THEY have something wrong with them.

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    Chin Checker g r ee n ey e s's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    Unless the implication is that either Rachel's death was not a suicide and her father was being super clever by using bullying as a defense, or they're saying Rachel was mentally ill, which, sometimes, you know, people have problems with other people and are socially ill-adjusted because THEY have something wrong with them.
    It just sounds somewhat far fetched, even if she was mentally ill and perpetuating her social outcasting. Sending a text to everyone saying terrible things about yourself sounds fucking looney bins beyond looney. And then to kill yourself afterwards??

    It just doesn't sound right.


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  6. #6
    sucks to your ass-mar Nancy Drew's Avatar
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    So wait, was it her dad's cell phone, or his residence? wut?
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    Moderator bowieluva's Avatar
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    I am going to say that I have personal experience with mentally ill people who do all sorts of fucked up things to themselves for attention/to blame other people, but I will also say that I'm wondering if the implication here is that her family sent the text after the suicide in order to plan for a lawsuit or something.

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    Chin Checker g r ee n ey e s's Avatar
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    It must have been a cellphone registered to her fathers address.

    Still, even if it were her plot to make her bully situation 'worse' so that she could transfer to a different school, what a terrible way to achieve that goal. Shit, maybe she did do it and then realized how much worse she made the situation and just gave up?

    Weird.


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    Member Megan Russell's Avatar
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    I think it's quite possible she did send out the text message herself, maybe to justify her reason to commit suicide.
    When I was about her age I dealt with a lot of bullying a depression (years later we discovered it was Borderline Personality Disorder all these years instead) I would pretty much self-sabotage myself with lies along with the other bullies just so I would have more of a 'reason' to 'end things'. Obviously this is pretty ridiculous, but at 14 I was a moron, so...

    I hope I don't sound like an asshole.

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    Senior Member rachy's Avatar
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    heres a article her sister speaks out.
    http://www.austindailyherald.com/201...-to-speak-out/

    i found her facebook http://www.facebook.com/rachel.ehmke

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    Moderator bowieluva's Avatar
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    I think also it's that people act like outside bullying is the cause of all a person's problems because it eradicates responsibility from the home life and the person's personal mental state. A lot of EMTs discuss how people will switch a body around and obviously tamper with a scene if they find a suicide, and i don't believe for an instant it's all for some altruistic desire to spare the deceased humiliation. It's to absolve themselves of the feelings of guilt and blame.

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    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    I think also it's that people act like outside bullying is the cause of all a person's problems because it eradicates responsibility from the home life and the person's personal mental state. A lot of EMTs discuss how people will switch a body around and obviously tamper with a scene if they find a suicide, and i don't believe for an instant it's all for some altruistic desire to spare the deceased humiliation. It's to absolve themselves of the feelings of guilt and blame.
    this this this a million times this. Overdoses too. They hide needles/stashes/paraphernalia etc. Sadly, you cant erase track marks, and you can't fudge blood tests.

    One of the most effed up calls I've been on was a very large family. The mother and father were home, and the older adult son was in his room. The younger brother came over and knocked on the bedroom door- hearing no reply, he went around the back of the house to the window and saw his brother slumped over the bed, and called 9-1-1. PD was able to break down the door- but in the process, the mom must've called every relative within a 50 mile radius because I am not kidding 30 people showed up, within a matter of minutes. The guy was dead, with the tourniquet still on, and the needle still in his arm. The brother kept yelling for us to "take it out"- we couldn't because the coroner hadn't been there yet. PD was in there taking pics like they were supposed to and the guys family was going batshit insane because they didn't want it to get out that the guy was a user.

    He was riddled in track marks, and there was paraphernalia/dirty needles all over the room. We had to stand by until they took the body away because we had multiple female bystanders/family members hyperventilating and having chest pains, the dad had a very recent heart attack, the cops were afraid of getting an accidental needle stick and the brother kept trying to fight with the cops and taking blows at them whenever he got a chance. It was super chaotic, and the whole family was just embarrassed and devastated and emotional- and extremely guilty for being home and not realize their son was lying dead in the next room for hours. They were literally fighting with the police and trying their damndest to get into the room to see the body and move/destroy evidence, even though it had already been seen and documented and his COD was very obvious. When they brought him out to go to the coroners van- pd had to physically block half the family from going in the room, and the other half of the family was just devastated and sad and grabbing, lying on, holding onto the (thankfully covered) body. Top it all off- the son's 16 year old daughter came home from school right as they were wheeling the guy outside on the coroner's gurney. If I have ever come close to a mental breakdown, it was after leaving this call.

    I know, I know, TL;DR- but there is an amazing dynamic involved when guilt for not doing anything to stop it and shame for knowing what happened are involved.
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    sucks to your ass-mar Nancy Drew's Avatar
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    The dead guy's daughter?

    That story is fucked, but I need to know.
    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    oMG, yeah, no, AMY is in no way superior to Tara. Never.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Nancy Drew View Post
    The dead guy's daughter?

    That story is fucked, but I need to know.
    The dead guys daughter, yes. In all the obsessive telephoning that family did, somebody neglected to call the school and let her know what was going on or send someone to intercept her. Bad news man, bad news.
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    sucks to your ass-mar Nancy Drew's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PunkerDuckie View Post
    The dead guys daughter, yes. In all the obsessive telephoning that family did, somebody neglected to call the school and let her know what was going on or send someone to intercept her. Bad news man, bad news.
    Holy fuck.
    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    oMG, yeah, no, AMY is in no way superior to Tara. Never.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Nancy Drew View Post
    Holy fuck.
    Stiff drinks were had that night.
    Quote Originally Posted by UncomfortablyNumb View Post
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    Senior Member atticus wench's Avatar
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    I half feel like she started the text herself as a wake-up call to her parents, like "see? it's this bad! take me out of this school!"

    The other half of me wonders how you can tell where and when a chain text originates...
    I was born to hustle roses down the avenues of the dead.
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    Senior Member TheFavoriteDaughter's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PunkerDuckie View Post
    this this this a million times this. Overdoses too. They hide needles/stashes/paraphernalia etc. Sadly, you cant erase track marks, and you can't fudge blood tests.

    One of the most effed up calls I've been on was a very large family. The mother and father were home, and the older adult son was in his room. The younger brother came over and knocked on the bedroom door- hearing no reply, he went around the back of the house to the window and saw his brother slumped over the bed, and called 9-1-1. PD was able to break down the door- but in the process, the mom must've called every relative within a 50 mile radius because I am not kidding 30 people showed up, within a matter of minutes. The guy was dead, with the tourniquet still on, and the needle still in his arm. The brother kept yelling for us to "take it out"- we couldn't because the coroner hadn't been there yet. PD was in there taking pics like they were supposed to and the guys family was going batshit insane because they didn't want it to get out that the guy was a user.

    He was riddled in track marks, and there was paraphernalia/dirty needles all over the room. We had to stand by until they took the body away because we had multiple female bystanders/family members hyperventilating and having chest pains, the dad had a very recent heart attack, the cops were afraid of getting an accidental needle stick and the brother kept trying to fight with the cops and taking blows at them whenever he got a chance. It was super chaotic, and the whole family was just embarrassed and devastated and emotional- and extremely guilty for being home and not realize their son was lying dead in the next room for hours. They were literally fighting with the police and trying their damndest to get into the room to see the body and move/destroy evidence, even though it had already been seen and documented and his COD was very obvious. When they brought him out to go to the coroners van- pd had to physically block half the family from going in the room, and the other half of the family was just devastated and sad and grabbing, lying on, holding onto the (thankfully covered) body. Top it all off- the son's 16 year old daughter came home from school right as they were wheeling the guy outside on the coroner's gurney. If I have ever come close to a mental breakdown, it was after leaving this call.

    I know, I know, TL;DR- but there is an amazing dynamic involved when guilt for not doing anything to stop it and shame for knowing what happened are involved.

    Wow They sound like.... an interesting group. I hate to say it, but some people behave like that, not because they're that devastated, but because they get off on the drama. This kinda sounds like the latter.

    I am such a cold, jaded bitch.
    Suzanne Knight (21) brutally raped and devoured 3 toddlers while on a meth binge before hanging herself Marky69: If those toddlers didnt want to be eaten then they shouldnt of looked so god damned delicious. RIP Suzanne

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    Senior Member rachy's Avatar
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    KASSON-MANTORVILLE, Minn. (KTTC) -- More details have been released in the death investigation surrounding 7th grader Rachel Ehmke.

    Rachel Ehmke's father is speaking out about the final days before his daughter's death.While authorities say bullying and harassment likely did play a role in Rachel's suicide, there's more to the story, including where a text message originated from.

    Rick Ehmke said he has been on an emotional and mental rollercoaster since Rachel's death. While he said he doesn't blame the bullies or the school for what happened... more could have been done to prevent such a tragic ending.

    Just a few days before her death, a text message went out to several Kasson-Mantorville middle school students addressing Rachel Ehmke in a negative way. Dodge County Sheriff Jim Jensen gives the messages crude details.

    "It referred to Rachel as a slut and suggested sending it around to get her out of school," said Sheriff Jensen.

    Four girls immediately reported the text message and school officials contacted law enforcement. Sheriff Jensen said the text was traced back to a website, known as Pinger, and then to its source.

    "We aren't sure who sent out the text message, the only thing we can say at this time with evidence we've collected is that it came from Rachel's father's home," stated the Sheriff.

    Rachel's dad, Rick, and Sheriff Jensen agreed, Rachel could have very well sent the text message.

    "She just told me, she said dad. They never did anything, it only got worse," explained Rick Ehmke.

    Rick Ehmke, said his 13-year old daughter Rachel was being bullied for more than a year.

    "There were no kids taken out of sports because of it, no kids made to say they are sorry. There were no kids that had to clean up the mess that they did to her locker or return the stuff they stole," said Ehmke.

    Rick said Rachel was degraded constantly and although school officials knew he says there were never consequences. Now, not only is the family without their daughter, but Rick said these girls will live with the outcome of their actions, forever.

    "If I saw them I would have to hug them, because there's not a charge in mankind that is going to bring my daughter back. These kids know who they are, these kids know deep down what was said and that's something they're going to have to live with the rest of their life," explained Ehmke.

    Since the suicide, Rick said the bullies and their families have had no contact with the Ehmkes - not a card, a hug nor an apology.

    Sheriff Jensen said the County Attorney's Office has determined there is insufficient evidence to charge anyone regarding this case. As for the school district, Superintendent, Mark Matuska said they'll continue to strengthen a number of anti-bullying programs.He says they want to continue working with parents, making sure the difference between right and wrong is established at home and in school.

    NEWS RELEASE:

    According to a news release sent by Dodge County Sheriff, Jim Jensen, investigators have been working on finding the source of a text message forwarded to several students' cell phones on April 26. The text referred to Rachel as a "slut" and suggested sending it around to get Rachel out of the school.

    Jensen's release states, "Through our investigation, which is still open pending autopsy results, we've determined that the text message in question originated from Rachel's father's residence, and possibly Rachel herself. Due to there being no suicide note left, we can only speculate as to her motivation for sending this message out. We did receive information that she had been talking to friends about trying to transfer out of KM because of problems she had been having there and had mentioned this to her parents on Friday (April 27)."

    On April 28, Rachel killed herself.

    Rachel's family says she had been dealing with on-going bullying at Kasson-Mantorville Middle School for several months and had mentioned wanting to change schools.

    According to the news release, investigators believe harassment and bullying were likely factors in Rachel's death. The news release states, "It appears that she had problems with a number of different people, of different ages, over the past several months. Unfortunately, there was a rush to judgment by many as to who was responsible for this most recent incident. Many of these students who have been singled out, harassed and bullied since her death were in fact students who Rachel told Officer Peck that she was now friends with again. There is not one incident or action done by any particular student(s) that we believe is responsible for Rachel's death."

    Investigators say several students, including four who originally reported the text message to Principal Al Hodge, were blamed for the message and had become the targets of bullying and harassment during the week after Rachel's death.

    The Kasson Police Department and K-M School District will now review bullying and harassment complaints filed, and consequences for students who participate in this behavior.

    http://www.kttc.com/story/18241381/m...-investigation

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    Chin Checker g r ee n ey e s's Avatar
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    Jesus, what a tangled web.


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    Moderator bowieluva's Avatar
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    So now the kids who reported the bullying are being bullied? Yeah, that sounds like junior high. I feel like everyone just uses the word bully to apply to anyone who's mean to another person.

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    Chin Checker g r ee n ey e s's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    So now the kids who reported the bullying are being bullied? Yeah, that sounds like junior high. I feel like everyone just uses the word bully to apply to anyone who's mean to another person.
    I kinda agree with this.

    Without conflict as a youth, how are you to understand resolution and how to deal with people you don't like or disagree with? Harassment and attitude are not the same. I mean, I would love the world to all get along, and sing happy songs all day.. but that shit isn't happening. Kids are little shits.

    This is also why my kid will not be allowed any social media anything OR a cellphone until they are 17.


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    Moderator bowieluva's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by g r ee n ey e s View Post
    I kinda agree with this.

    Without conflict as a youth, how are you to understand resolution and how to deal with people you don't like or disagree with? Harassment and attitude are not the same. I mean, I would love the world to all get along, and sing happy songs all day.. but that shit isn't happening. Kids are little shits.

    This is also why my kid will not be allowed any social media anything OR a cellphone until they are 17.
    Seriously, this is why I am going to encourage my kid to actually be a kid instead of trying to train them to be my bestest friend.

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    My thoughts exactly! I took my daughter(4) to play at Mcdonalds and some kid came up to her and said "Your a bully!" and my daughter hadnt said shit! Then the chics brother was trying to get by while my daughter was sitting on the step and he said "Your mean and a bully cause you wont let me up the stair!" I was about to show them a BULLY! But the worst part was that same morning said daughter called my schanuzer fat and I said "Dont call names.. thats bullying!" So YEAH needless to say my daughter felt like shit that day :(

    On another note.. I was about to freak out about rachels profile pic of the hands... See that image in the water of an old women??!?!!??! Then I saw a spider graphic on the rock to the left and realized its probably some editing software that makes your photos creepy hahahahaha!


    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    So now the kids who reported the bullying are being bullied? Yeah, that sounds like junior high. I feel like everyone just uses the word bully to apply to anyone who's mean to another person.

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