Lordy lordy, when will these criminals ever learn?
First, if you really must brag about your crimes, do it face to face, preferably somewhere you won't be overheard.
Second, if you really, really must do it on Facebook, and it just isn't enough to do it in a private message, lock down your profile so snooping cops can't see it as easily as Hair Balls reporters. I mean, two full weeks after College Station couple Gina Noel Wilfong (who goes by Lily Anderson on Facebook) and Joseph Woods Smith smashed up a Jeep belonging to Wilfong's ex, this little gem is still there for all the world to see (at bottom of post):
Brazos County Jail
Joseph Woods Smith: Might be wishing he wore a turtleneck, but looks like Valentine's Day was fun.
Now isn't that just the sweetest thing ever! Yeah, Joseph, breaking glass with your honey is the best stress reliever ever! And Lily, you sure did show that fucking lil prick who was boss! And it just brings a tear to this jaded reporter's eye when he sees Smith sigh about the great night they spent together...
When Anderson posted that idiocy, Bryan cops were already on her trail. According to the Bryan-College Station Eagle, a witness gave her description to police, and her ex told them it sounded a lot like Wilfong. Two days later she allegedly came back for more, and this time the ex saw the 21-year-old drive off. He then noticed that someone had chipped his paint, slashed a seat cover and broken another window on his ride.
By then, the ex had seen the Woods-Wilfong Facebragging exchange and he helpfully provided the cops a link.
Sadly for the ex, the cops were not able to stop a third assault on his Jeep on February 13, but the two were apprehended the next day. After her arrest, Wilfong reportedly told cops that the ex had forced her to marry him and that they were recently divorced.
Brazos County records did show that the ex had gotten a divorce in October, albeit from some other woman. He told police he had dated Wilfong for about two weeks and had then thrown her out of his house.
Total damage to the Jeep is estimated at $1,700, which makes the offense Wilfong and Smith allegedly committed a state-jail felony punishable by up to two years in jail.
Bragging about it on Facebook? Especially Aggravated Capital Stupidity, but sadly, there's no sentence for that.