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Thread: Mother-in-law sends rude email to bride: forgivable?

  1. #1
    I'm fancy ketchup HockeyGirl's Avatar
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    Mother-in-law sends rude email to bride: forgivable?



    New term: mom-zilla. We know all about temporary bridal insanity, and the underreported groom version, but in some families, it’s the parents who are seized by irrational wedding meltdowns.

    Last month, 60-year-old British florist and total mom-zilla, Carolyn Bourne attacked. After her stepson’s bride-to-be, Heidi Withers, was a guest in her house she had a thing or two to teach her before she entered the Bourne family.

    So Bourne sent the 29-year-old a soul-crushing email. The subject line: “Your lack of manners.” The bullet points for the bride, in paraphrase: her wedding is going to be tacky, she’s too picky of an eater, her sense of humor sucks, and her stepson is making a dreadful choice in marrying her. And one more thing: her out-of-work parents are cheap.

    When Withers received the email (Bourne sent it three times to be sure) she did what anyone would do: she forwarded it to a few friends to share in the shock. What was the alternative —respond with a 'frowny' face? But instead of simply offering advice, some anonymous friend got pro-active and forwarded Bourne’s e-attack, launching a viral sensation in a matter of hours. Now everyone in the Western Hemisphere has laid eyes on Bourne’s email.

    In a way, it’s the ultimate revenge on a mother-in-law who needed to be put in her place after such power-mongering. But it’s not going to make for smooth wedding. Bourne has been labeled the mother-in-law from hell by media outlets and Withers’ father Alan has fueled the fire by publicly calling Bourne “Miss fancy pants." Now parents on both sides of the couple are fueding and nobody's manners are in check. Suggestion for Heidi and Freddie, her groom: elope.

    Bourne has told London's Telegraph she still plans to attend the wedding, but will maintain a "dignified silence." She may know about English etiquette but she’s clueless about the cardinal rule of the Internet: never send an email you don’t want the world to see. You almost have to feel bad for the lady, mom-zilla or not. That is, until you read the actual email she sent Withers. Here’s an excerpt:

    from: Carolyn Bourne
    to: heidi withers
    subject: your lack of manners

    Here are a few examples of your lack of manners:

    When you are a guest in another's house, you do not declare what you will and will not eat - unless you are positively allergic to something.

    You do not remark that you do not have enough food.

    You do not start before everyone else.

    You do not take additional helpings without being invited to by your host.

    When a guest in another's house, you do not lie in bed until late morning in households that rise early - you fall in line with house norms.

    You should never ever insult the family you are about to join at any time and most definitely not in public. I gather you passed this off as a joke but the reaction in the pub was one of shock, not laughter.

    You regularly draw attention to yourself. Perhaps you should ask yourself why. No one gets married in a castle unless they own it. It is brash, celebrity style behaviour.

    I understand your parents are unable to contribute very much towards the cost of your wedding. (There is nothing wrong with that except that convention is such that one might presume they would have saved over the years for their daughters' marriages.)

    If this is the case, it would be most ladylike and gracious to lower your sights and have a modest wedding as befits both your incomes.

    One could be accused of thinking that Heidi Withers must be patting herself on the back for having caught a most eligible young man. I pity Freddie.

    Ouch. There's no denying it's harsh, but if you've ever been in the line of fire in a wedding party, you know marriage anxieties strike darkness in the hearts of man. What do you think: Is this mom's email forgivable?

    http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/sex/m...vable-2504517/

  2. #2
    Senior Member deeply shaded's Avatar
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    This woman think she's the queen or something? Sheesh.

    Forgivable? I dunno. It would depend on what happens from here on out. I tend to forgive but I would never, ever, ever forget this. It would be burned into my heart and soul forever.
    Quote Originally Posted by beli View Post
    kim kardashian - made famous for having a sex tape, should die in a fire
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    I'm fancy ketchup HockeyGirl's Avatar
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    I just wonder what the husband-to-be thinks about this.
    The mother said she pities her son. Thats harsh lol

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    Chin Checker g r ee n ey e s's Avatar
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    Evil step mother.


    Quote Originally Posted by MoonDancer View Post
    And apparently you fuck the mods here.

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    Senior Member TheFavoriteDaughter's Avatar
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    I would assume this lady is just an out and out bitch. I wonder if she always behaves like this.
    Suzanne Knight (21) brutally raped and devoured 3 toddlers while on a meth binge before hanging herself Marky69: If those toddlers didnt want to be eaten then they shouldnt of looked so god damned delicious. RIP Suzanne

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    Riotous Defective snowfallsoon's Avatar
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    I'm glad she didn't respond with that frowny face.

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    has supermodel tits neenerneener's Avatar
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    Well, it was a rude email, to be sure. I have to say, though...the evil stepmom is right about most of her points.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ron_NYC
    I want to kiss your lips. Both sets.
    * wow you truly are the sterial cunt here are yo not.I fuckin hate you cunt* - Loonywop
    ★ take the sig down ★ - Loonywop

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    I'm fancy ketchup HockeyGirl's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by neenerneener View Post
    Well, it was a rude email, to be sure. I have to say, though...the evil stepmom is right about most of her points.
    i knew someone was going to say that!
    I just thought it would have been Ron

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    Senior Member poppy213's Avatar
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    I would like to think that since she is gonna be one of the family, that the Mother-in-Law would be just that a mother, to her. She can just as easily help her kindly with her manners and not through a rude email.

    "Satisfaction of ones curiosity is one of the greatest sources of happiness in life" Linus Pauling

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    Certified Grumple Bottoms Ron_NYC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by HockeyGirl View Post
    i knew someone was going to say that!
    I just thought it would have been Ron
    Oh my God, you're finally getting to know me!

    Yea, maybe this broad sucks and the kid doesn't see it yet.
    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    Ron was the best part, hands down.

  11. #11
    Senior Member deeply shaded's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by neenerneener View Post
    Well, it was a rude email, to be sure. I have to say, though...the evil stepmom is right about most of her points.
    Please come to my house for dinner. I'll be having Lime-cilantro grilled steak, grilled vegetables with cilantro butter and cilantro salad. You will eat it without complaint, I assume?
    Quote Originally Posted by beli View Post
    kim kardashian - made famous for having a sex tape, should die in a fire
    Quote Originally Posted by McMama View Post
    Have you ever walked into a mall, sat on God's lap, and had your picture taken?

  12. #12
    Moderator bowieluva's Avatar
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    Sounds like a mom who has a creepy relationship with her son. This is why I like to date people who are estranged from their families or they're dead.

    No way to alienate your kid more than to do shit like this, even if you're right. Oh, and at only getting married in a castle if you own it. sorry hockey girl.

  13. #13
    Senior Member once_again's Avatar
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    The mom-inlaw better chill, she's at risk at not seeing the grandbabies.
    Toodle Loo

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    Certified Grumple Bottoms Ron_NYC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by deeply shaded View Post
    Please come to my house for dinner. I'll be having Lime-cilantro grilled steak, grilled vegetables with cilantro butter and cilantro salad. You will eat it without complaint, I assume?
    I would.

    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    No way to alienate your kid more than to do shit like this, even if you're right. Oh, and at only getting married in a castle if you own it. sorry hockey girl.
    Do I even wanna know?

    Quote Originally Posted by once_again View Post
    The mom-inlaw better chill, she's at risk at not seeing the grandbabies.
    Pfft, who says the son thinks she's wrong? This chick seems more annoying than the mom to me.
    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    Ron was the best part, hands down.

  15. #15
    Senior Member once_again's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ron_NYC View Post
    I would.
    I know. I was going to say, invite me, but that would be rude, right?

    Quote Originally Posted by Ron_NYC View Post
    Pfft, who says the son thinks she's wrong? This chick seems more annoying than the mom to me.
    I appreciate manners, but to stress so much about little things like that is a bit much.
    Toodle Loo

  16. #16
    Certified Grumple Bottoms Ron_NYC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by once_again View Post
    I know. I was going to say, invite me, but that would be rude, right?



    I appreciate manners, but to stress so much about little things like that is a bit much.
    You want the best for your kid, right? So if they bring home some douche that takes off his shoes and puts his bare feet on the dinner table to clip his nails.....is that cool?

    Not as bad as this picky eater, but still./......just sayin'.
    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    Ron was the best part, hands down.

  17. #17
    Senior Member d0tti's Avatar
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    Eh, she got her revenge by everyone knowing how much of a cow the mother in law is lol.

  18. #18
    Senior Member once_again's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ron_NYC View Post
    You want the best for your kid, right? So if they bring home some douche that takes off his shoes and puts his bare feet on the dinner table to clip his nails.....is that cool?

    Not as bad as this picky eater, but still./......just sayin'.
    She didn't do that. She took a plate to go without asking permission first, which is rude but not extremely rude.
    Toodle Loo

  19. #19
    NOT SAME CAT Fleta's Avatar
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    Wow. First off, completely out of line to send an email, but I'm all about good old-fashioned bluntness. Emailing seems so passive-aggressive.

    Second... I don't see the big deal about any of the stuff MIL is bitching about. Maybe a little tactless, but I also believe in being a gracious hostess and hoping my guests will be as comfortable and relaxed as possible, moreso than my belief in being a gracious, uptight guest. I'd rather (and do) stay at home or in a hotel than be uncomfortable.

    MIL is a raging c-unit and would most definitely not be invited to my grand, expensive, castle wedding. Good thing my OH knows what's what. Also a good thing my MIL is awesome white trash. Help with dishes and bring some beer and she's a happy hostess

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    Certified Grumple Bottoms Ron_NYC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by d0tti View Post
    Eh, she got her revenge by everyone knowing how much of a cow the mother in law is lol.
    Ha, I feel the total opposite. Go mom!

    Quote Originally Posted by once_again View Post
    She didn't do that. She took a plate to go without asking permission first, which is rude but not extremely rude.
    All relative, but I see your point.
    Quote Originally Posted by bowieluva View Post
    Ron was the best part, hands down.

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    Senior Member jessielee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by once_again View Post
    She didn't do that. She took a plate to go without asking permission first, which is rude but not extremely rude.
    well, She did say the parents were broke. Maybe bitch was hungry. Didnt know when she may eat next

  22. #22
    NOT SAME CAT Fleta's Avatar
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    Looks to me like she didn't take a plate to go; she had seconds. I had no idea that was considered rude.

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    Senior Member JuvenileTD1's Avatar
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    Wow!!! Someone needs to send an email to her about good manners!! I might be able to forgive, but it would take a few years...and I like to see what the wedding gift is first:)

  24. #24
    Senior Member deeply shaded's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ron_NYC View Post
    Ha, I feel the total opposite. Go mom!


    All relative, but I see your point.
    It doesn't even matter what went on. All this shit is so fucking insignificant. MIL is probably a raging cunt wanna be snob. I'd spit in her face, kick the boy in the balls, fill my plate and walk out the door.
    Quote Originally Posted by beli View Post
    kim kardashian - made famous for having a sex tape, should die in a fire
    Quote Originally Posted by McMama View Post
    Have you ever walked into a mall, sat on God's lap, and had your picture taken?

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    Senior Member poppy213's Avatar
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    How dare she have seconds without asking permission.

    If anything that is a compliment to the cook.

    "Satisfaction of ones curiosity is one of the greatest sources of happiness in life" Linus Pauling

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