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Thread: Hallelujah! Christian Sex Toys

  1. #1
    I'm fancy ketchup HockeyGirl's Avatar
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    Hallelujah! Christian Sex Toys

    :lol: i dont know if this is weird or bizarre but it gave me a chuckle.

    Here is the actual website the article is referencing:
    http://www.book22.com/merchant2/merchant.mvc?Screen=SFNT&Store_Code=Book22

    [size=15pt]Hallelujah! Christian Sex Toys[/size]

    After compiling the list of the best sex shops in America, it came to my attention that there is a Christian sex shop that I overlooked. Mostly because I didn't realize that Christians needed their own sex shop.
    Other than preferring the missionary position, perhaps there are a few Christian needs that differ from regular old agnostics, Jews, Muslims, or atheists. Let's take a look around Book22, shall we?

    Book22 references the Song of Solomon, "I am my beloveds and my beloved is mine," which emphasizes marriage. So the point of Book22 is to offer enhancements for married, heterosexual couples (although they don't ask for a copy of your marriage license upon checking out).

    Other services Book22 offers is the removal of any potentially offensive packaging from their products, and information on what is okay and what is not okay in the Christian marriage bed. Note -- aside from being anti-gay, their list of no-nos is pretty standard stuff for the non-Christian monogamous relationship.

    Aside from that qualifier, you'll still find c--- rings, edibles, and waterproof vibes for the G-spot. However, these products appear in the online shop as a result of the couple praying for guidance. Rather than, say, market research? I'm not sure I understand the difference and I was a regular at Sunday School as a kid.

    One area Book22 emphasizes, which can only be lauded as a community service, are the sexual aid needs outside of the standard sex toy box -- including enhancers for elderly or disabled couples.
    http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/sex/hallelujah-christian-sex-toys-2038784/


  2. #2
    Senior Member A Midnight Dreary's Avatar
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    Re: Hallelujah! Christian Sex Toys

    :lol: This is my fav:

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    Re: Hallelujah! Christian Sex Toys


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    I'm fancy ketchup HockeyGirl's Avatar
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    Re: Hallelujah! Christian Sex Toys

    [quote author=A Midnight Dreary link=topic=26108.msg1673069#msg1673069 date=1279307762]
    :lol: This is my fav:

    [/quote]
    :2shocked: it has potential to be my fav too
    ...what are you supposed to do with it?

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    Re: Hallelujah! Christian Sex Toys

    [quote author=HockeyGirl link=topic=26108.msg1673432#msg1673432 date=1279334589]
    :2shocked: it has potential to be my fav too
    ...what are you supposed to do with it?
    [/quote]

    From the name I've already got quite an idea.

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    Re: Hallelujah! Christian Sex Toys

    [quote author=HyperU2 link=topic=26108.msg1673466#msg1673466 date=1279335593]
    From the name I've already got quite an idea.
    [/quote]

    :lol: Touche

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    Senior Member Suus88's Avatar
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    Re: Hallelujah! Christian Sex Toys

    I think we have a shop with sex toys for Muslims in Holland. Because some of the normal sex toys contain products of animals. And that's haram.

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    Senior Member aphaziak's Avatar
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    Re: Hallelujah! Christian Sex Toys

    [quote author=Suus88 link=topic=26108.msg1673699#msg1673699 date=1279371769]
    I think we have a shop with sex toys for Muslims in Holland. Because some of the normal sex toys contain products of animals. And that's haram.
    [/quote]

    Crazy. Never really pondered such a thing before. Religion is so bizarre  :lol:
    Quote Originally Posted by ZoMyGoddess! View Post
    maybe when the check comes next time, just throw your dick on the table and be like "if you got the check, i got dessert"

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    Senior Member pollypocket's Avatar
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    Re: Hallelujah! Christian Sex Toys

    I dunno, I kind of see there being a big market for a website like this. It's understandable that a more conservative couple would be interested in buying sex toys online without being bombarded with porno images. 
    I will go to the animal shelter and get you a kitty cat. I will let you fall in love with that kitty cat; and then on some dark cold night, I will steal away into your home, and punch you in the face.

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    Senior Member yellowCake1's Avatar
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    Re: Hallelujah! Christian Sex Toys

    This one kills me  :lol: Not the actual product just the name



    [size=12pt]Happy Penis 1 oz[/size]

    Get ready for an exceptional sensory experience! Happy Penis Massage Cream is specially formulated to create a warming, tingling effect as you massage- making for one very happy penis. Perfect for bed, bath or shower and deliciously edible & Sugar Free! 1oz bottle

  11. #11
    Senior Member aphaziak's Avatar
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    Re: Hallelujah! Christian Sex Toys

    [quote author=pollypocket link=topic=26108.msg1674036#msg1674036 date=1279412450]
    I dunno, I kind of see there being a big market for a website like this. It's understandable that a more conservative couple would be interested in buying sex toys online without being bombarded with porno images. 
    [/quote]

    It's just that what is considered acceptable is such a... passing, imperfect, human value that changes over time. The fact that a religion dictates that porn is evil but toys aren't just seems ridiculous to me. Sorry.
    Quote Originally Posted by ZoMyGoddess! View Post
    maybe when the check comes next time, just throw your dick on the table and be like "if you got the check, i got dessert"

  12. #12
    creep trailerparktrash's Avatar
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    Re: Hallelujah! Christian Sex Toys

    COOL BEANS.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cap-n Meow
    TPT is more caramel. She's sweet and so smooth she'll slide a finger in your butthole.

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    Senior Member Suus88's Avatar
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    Re: Hallelujah! Christian Sex Toys

    [quote author=aphaziak link=topic=26108.msg1674029#msg1674029 date=1279411519]
    Crazy. Never really pondered such a thing before. Religion is so bizarre  :lol:
    [/quote]

    I know. Just because the animal isn't slaughtered in a halal way. I'm a vegetarian but I don't buy veggie sex toys :lol:

  14. #14
    I'm fancy ketchup HockeyGirl's Avatar
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    Re: Hallelujah! Christian Sex Toys

    [quote author=yellowCake1 link=topic=26108.msg1674042#msg1674042 date=1279413267]

    Get ready for an exceptional sensory experience! Happy Penis Massage Cream is specially formulated to create a warming, tingling effect as you massage- making for one very happy penis. Perfect for bed, bath or shower and deliciously edible & Sugar Free! 1oz bottle

    [/quote]
    :lol:
    Well now that I know its sugar free im on board.
    I count carbs when i lick Penis 

  15. #15
    Senior Member aphaziak's Avatar
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    Re: Hallelujah! Christian Sex Toys

    [quote author=HockeyGirl link=topic=26108.msg1674232#msg1674232 date=1279440093]
    :lol:
    Well now that I know its sugar free im on board.
    I count carbs when i lick Penis 
    [/quote]

    :lol:
    Quote Originally Posted by ZoMyGoddess! View Post
    maybe when the check comes next time, just throw your dick on the table and be like "if you got the check, i got dessert"

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